Smuggler Archive

Thread: A chuckle for the smuggler

-Ory
Thu Oct 07, 2004 8:43 pm
#1275

I LOVE THIS THREAD!!!11!!ONEONE!!!



FOREROOEOE From Bria
Master Brawler and stuff
lurdanta
Fri Oct 08, 2004 12:44 am
#1276



Daermoth wrote:

......I finally called my brand new 8K cdef pistol a loss, and stayed home.........


And THAT is the line that dates you...lol.

OK, so this is a new one for me. After my little episode of getting beaten on while AFK, I've been very cautious while selling faction points. Apparently even heavily guarded faction bases are dangerous. So when i get a tell from a known PVP nut of the opposing faction, telling me to come to the rebel outpost on Rori so he and 6 of his friends can switch sides, I naturally laughed at him and told him to fly a kite. He persisted, and my curiosity got the best of me.

I land at the outpost to see seven members of DREAD, a rather well known pvp guild who has tricked players into getting killed on more than one occasion, including me when i was newer and oh so much more trusting. For those of you who arent on bloodfin or never met Slawface Haxxxxxxx, he is one of the more violent elites on the server.

I tap my feign death macro and explain to them that i need the money up front to buy faction. amazingly they all agreed, paid me, and I did the scariest thing that I have done yet in the game. I declare in the middle of this bunch of hardcore reb killers and begin delegating them enough faction to turn rebel, all the while expecting a declared group member to come roaring into town to start the beating. I am never quite sure of who all my personal enemies are, as the lines of kinship and brotherly ties are invisible, and up until the last delegation I was positive this was an elaborate ruse to get me to declare.

After spending an hour delegating out faction, with my bloodpressure shooting through the roof, they finally all were declared rebels. I couldn't believe it. Not even a joking /duel challenge. I had lived! They really had gone rebel so they could get more PVP in. The kicker to the story is that 20 minutes later I flew to anchorhead, still declared, to sell a full set of marine armor to someone. Not 5 minutes into it, an imperial member of DREAD hits town, and as i am the only one declared, he jumps me. Fortunately that trusty feign death macro is running, so instead of killing me he can only pound. I am still grouped with the 7 other members of Dread, and I ask em if they wouldnt mind knocking him off me. Instead, they send him a tell to leave me to my business, and he leaves anchorhead entirely.

I guess sometimes it does pay to trust people. Either way, im gonna go have a heart attack now.






Man, I got nervous just reading your story...

Newplague
Fri Oct 08, 2004 7:24 pm
#1277

It's gettin kinda low on the list, C'mon ppl! Love this thread!
AtomPolaris
Fri Oct 08, 2004 10:55 pm
#1278

great thread but i prefer not to tell some of the things ive gone through....PS dam* the slice gods!!!



MechaGodzilla - Master Bounty Hunter
Force Sensitive Jedi wannabe
Accolade Bio Badge winner--Alliance Defense Squadron
ikolian
Sat Oct 09, 2004 8:53 am
#1279



Ok, this is a conversation my group had while doing a base takedown. There'sseveral of us, a real heavy pvp group, including some jedi. We all managed to get into the base undetected and were working on the slicing of the terminals. He's the conversation starting when a covert imperial player (Iepa) showed up (known as a smurf because thier radar dots are blue) :



Me: [groupchat] smurf

Hades: [groupchat] stay inside

Zerocqct: [groupchat] quick act like you're doing something

Zerocqct: [groupchat] lol

Hades twiddles his thumbs.

Hades whistles innocently.

Kylas: Hades did you bring the keg?

You whistle innocently.

Hades: yes I did

Hades taps the keg.

Kylas: sweet.

Zerocqct Zero: we are all going imp um yaya

Kylas: so much for spatial silence huh?

Iepa Iwridre (the covert imperial): what's happening?

Hades: [groupchat] yeah that's another one... when found out only use groupchat

Me: Massive imp conversion

Iepa Iwridre: Ah

Hades: [groupchat] lol nice

Iepa Iwridre: everyone around here?

Gobwan Whiptakoo: yep

You nod.

Iepa Iwridre: hmm

Gobwan Wiptakoo: but it seems your base is bugged

Gobwan Wiptakoo: won't let us join

Hades: stupid rebel faction think they so tough

Kylas: yah screw rebs

Iepa Iwridre: but you are rebs

Iepa Iwridre: are you not?

Kylas: uh...

Me: We got a smuggler running a faction buying macro it'll take about 10 minutes.

Kylas nods at you.

Hades: yeah cost me about 30 mil cr for everyone

Me: Takes a while to get out of a -5000 hole

Iepa Iwridre: yes

Hades: [groupchat] can't wait to see his face if he actually believes us

(stormtroopers respawn at this point, and we slaughter then quickly)

Hades: Wirzi no helping : P

Kylas: oh damn...

Zerocqct Zero: doh

Kylas: now I'm -5K again

Hades: another 2K of cr for that faction

Kylas blames Hades.

gobwan: [groupchat] lol


The guy hangs around for a bit and eventually leaves, I still wonder if he believed us or not- lol

Message Edited by ikolian on 10-09-2004 08:54 AM



Colonel Eanow Wo'Tah- Valcyn Server
Alliance Ace pilot/Swordsman/Master of almost mastering professions then dropping them
Almost mastered Pikeman/Ranger/Commando/Fencer
Namessiah
Sat Oct 09, 2004 5:28 pm
#1280

Dude: hey you there?

Me: Yea

Dude: may I buy a 35% damage slice

Me: Sorry, I'm out of 'em. Gota crate of29% slices left tho.

Dude: no it's ok I'll find some other smuggler



Maybe not that funny, but I laughed for a while



______________________________
Ridcully [Chimaera] Pikeman
Normal [Bloodfin] Chef
Reginald [Infinity] Bio-Engineer
Bumbi [Bria] Bounty Hunter
nasafan2
Sun Oct 10, 2004 7:02 pm
#1281


Greatest thread ever. I read every page, all 56 lol.


Inspired me to become a smuggler I tell ya.



Irell Rokich

"We Choose to go to the Moon in this decade and do the other things.
Not because they are easy, but because they are hard." - JFK


TheHealer15
Sun Oct 10, 2004 10:09 pm
#1282

i think i'm surrounded by nothing but smart people seriously. On valcyn i have never had one stupid question asked of me,nobody has ever done anything stupid at all. sometimes i hate being surrounded by smart people You guys get all the funny people lol
FlanMacMilan
Mon Oct 11, 2004 4:50 am
#1283







He agrees, we trade and he hands me a RIS armor helmet. I use my clamp, cut the first wire and am about to cut the second wire when....


"I'm hoping for an effectiveness slice."





The same happend to me just last night. I receive a call from a perfect stranger.


PS - Hey!

me - yes?

PS- do you slice?

me - I do if you come to my town. (was helping a fellow guildy raising rifle)

PS - np. omw with next shuttle.


so i wait a few minutes and this big fat wookiee amored from head to toe appears to me.


BFW - hey!

me - /greet hi there! what can i do for you today?

BFW - slice a weapon.

me - sure! 3k per slice.

BFW - np. hands me a very nice bowcaster.


I install my clamp and he goes:


BFW - I hope for a 33% damage slice. hehehe

me - /sigh you shouldn't have told me...


cut first wire, cut second wire. boom!


me - 11% speed slice.

BFW - /cry

me- /pat


the guy ran to get another bowcaster and was clever enough not to tell me what he wanted. got a nice 27% damage on the second try.





nitemare111
Tue Oct 12, 2004 1:22 am
#1284

Heh, I've told all my friends to sacrifice goats when I slice for them.

So far, it's working, at least in keeping people from griping at me.


/me: Here we go.

/them: *sacrifices goat*

/goat: blargh!

/me: 32% damage

/them: woohoo!

/me: next one

/them: ... (still celebrating)

/goat #2: *whew*

/me: 11% speed

/them: *cry*

/me: next one

/them *sacrifices goat*

/goat #2: blargh!

/me: 12% damage

/them: goddam*ed defective goat!



Dovinda Nitemare (retired October 2004)
Master Rifleman
Master Smuggler
Medic/Scout/Shipwright
WTH happened to this game? Nice work, SOE.
MoogleDee
Tue Oct 12, 2004 2:58 pm
#1285

Do the server gods like goats? Is there any other sort of... slicing ritual customers go through?



~ Kyoji Tsukuru ~
Imperial Inquisition Ace

WillburWright
Tue Oct 12, 2004 3:30 pm
#1286


My story:




(A Dev)uses Nerf Attack on you for 10000 points of damage.


Willbur Wright's Morale Armor -70% Base 90% Nerf- Prevents 9000 points of damage


Willbur Wright is stunned!


(A Dev)uses Revamp-Delay on Willbur Wright for 52313 points of damage.


Willbur Wright is dizzied!


Willbur Wright is pissed!


Willbur Wright gives up smuggler in favor of a more promising template until the revamp.


Willbur Wright uses Bleeding shot on you for 600 points of damage


You start to bleed!


Willbur Wright uses Health Shot 1 on you for 456 points of damage


You start to bleed!


Willbur Wright uses Health Shot 2 on you for 874 points of damage


You start to bleed!


Willbur Wright uses torso shot on you for 1004 points of damage


You are on fire!


Willbur Wright uses Lowblow on you for 304 points of damage


Willbur Wright uses Last Dtitch Attack on you for2230 points of damage


Willbur Wright uses Last Dtitch Attack on you for2157 points of damage


Willbur Wright uses Last Dtitch Attack on you for1983 points of damage


Willbur Wright uses Last Dtitch Attack on you for2078 points of damage


Willbur Wright uses Last Dtitch Attack on you for 1305 points of damage


Willbur Wright uses Last Dtitch Attack on you for 1565 points of damage


Willbur Wright uses Last Dtitch Attack on you for 1489 points of damage


Willbur Wright uses Last Dtitch Attack on you for 1763 points of damage


Willbur Wright uses Last Dtitch Attack on you for 1289 points of damage


You have been incapacitated.


You have died.


You have felt the pent up anger of a former smuggler unleashed when he is now effective in combat. Have a nice day!


Jakkal_Darkwind
Tue Oct 12, 2004 3:59 pm
#1287

lol strait from teh ahazi goodness


newb in theed (wearing chintin armour w/ a tusken "all rebels leave this town"


me "you'd better watch what you say, many rebels have friends in high places"


newb "like any of those slimeballs could touch me!"


me "well with the video of you shouting that that i just put up on the bothan spynet im sure a bounty hunter will be after you soon, some of em owe me favors (im a bothan btw so it makes sense)"


never grinned so much in my life




like jedis? play kotor
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