Smuggler Archive

Ok this is my first story dont reacall all the details.

I was in the bestine cantinaa with my master tag up suddenly i get a tell from a dude.

dude: Can you slicemy armor?

me: sure meet me in the cantina

Im in full tusken outfit so i figured that i wouldnt be to hard to spot

dude: /howl Brotto where are you?

Me: right in front of you...

several minuts pass.

dude: /trade

me: my fee is 5k a slice do we have a agreement?

several minuts pass then a bank tip comes in consiting of 5k

Me: ok trade

trade window goes up several minuts pass. then he puts two pieces in the trade window.

Me: as I said you do understand I charge 5k "a" slice dont you?

dude: --------

several minuts pass then a banktip of another 5k

me: ok trade

and several min. (you get the point)

I slice some medium good enumbrance and trade back

me: trade

he gets his armor and i get my money.

Needles to say the thought of tipping him the money back and run like hell crossed my time several times

ahh, but until you know the joy of the idiot who only trades 2 items at a time, then gives you two more, then two more, at that speed, you havent TRULY experienced smuggler.

dude: Like what?

me: Shhhhhh !!! ... not so loud THEY will hear you ....

dude: Huh .. Who ????

me: /whisper turn around .. don't look at me....

dude: <decides to play along !! Wooot !!><turns to his side and begins to whistle innocently>

me: I can sometimes make your weapon faster, sometimes make it shoot father, or even ... hehe .. sometimes make it do more damage ... just depends on which wires i cut ...

dude: How much ?

me: Shhhhhhh !!!! .... be quite ....

<by this time several ppl have gathered around us asking things like "What the $#%! are you guys on ... etc >

me: it's getting too crowded here <in front of the Theed Starport right where ppl spawn> .... follow me over here ...

dude: ok

me: <walks over only 5m> I offer my services for only 100cr per % of the "enhancement"

<at this time another Smuggler comes up and does a secret smuggler hand shake with me>

dude: ok sounds good ..

<we trade ... dude gets a 19% speed slice ... pays the 1900 .. never once complained about low slice>

dude: Thanks Man!

me: shhhhh !!! you don't know me .. this never happened ..

me:<walks slowly away>

dude: /whisper thanks man

It was almost 2am my time and I was logging right after that ... had trouble going to sleep with the sheepish grin that was on my face...

I am a smuggler .. this is what I do ...

but you didn't hear it from me

Thanks to all who inspired me to be a great smuggler .. not just a slice bot .. TY TY TY .. keep the stories coming in

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Daermoth wrote:
ahh, but until you know the joy of the idiot who only trades 2 items at a time, then gives you two more, then two more, at that speed, you havent TRULY experienced smuggler.

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Oh god, Daermoth.. You just brought back a horrible memory (*twitch*). I had one dude who said he needed some armor sliced and passed me one piece. I sliced it, passed it back, in comes another. I figure OK, he can't have too much, but after five pieces I say to him "Can't you just give me all the pieces at once?". He responds and says "I prefer to do it this way.". He had a full suit of composite plus a couple more. (*stomach tightens*) I suspect he thought I was going to run off with it if he gave me more than one piece.

And by the way, Ducktaped... Nice RP story... I enjoyed that!

haha these are great but i got a dummy for you....

Me: /shout Smuggler slicing containers! Pst to Sune!
Dummy: Why would you want to slice a container? Wouldn't that RUIN it?
Me: What are you talking about?
Dummy: Well i am getting a key for this thing cause I don't want my container sliced in half and the stuff inside ruined...
Me: umm that isn't what slicing in this game LITERALLY means...
Dummy: lady, don't you EVEN tell me I don't know my english
Me: umm alrighty then...maybe you should read SWG for dummies...chances are it will help
Me: /ignore

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WillburWright wrote:
Another chuckle: 666 posts!

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And, I saved my 777th post for here too.

Now I am a lucky smuggler!

0101001101101101011101010110011101

I was in the Coronet Starport one evening and I was doing my slicing advert. Some dude asks me to slice a Container for him so I say no probs and go ahead with it. No problem, the thing opens and I trade it back to him without opening it (it ain't my container) and I swear, this is verbatim:

Dude: Hey a**hole gimme the force crystal!
Me: What force crystal?
Dude: Don't give me that s**t, give me my force crystal!
Me: Seriously man, I didn't get a force crystal from it. I didn't even open the thing, just sliced it and gave it back.
Dude: F***ing a**hole.

He then runs off. My advert had the line "100% guaranteed success" in it. Now it has "(this DOESN'T mean I get a force crystal)" added to it.