Smuggler Archive
Thread: Since our chosen profession is a joke, I propose that we tell some.....
Grati wrote:
Has anyone realized that 90% of the jokes above started with either "This guys wants into a bar" or "the irish man walks into a pub".....
Anyone see a connection between pubs/bars and smugglers??? Yeah, so do I. On that note, I need a drink
Great. And mine was about 2 old people having sex.
Believe it or not a little old lady told me this one:
On a boring rainy day a lady decided to go clean out her attic. While she was going through her posessions and cleaning she found a lamp. She thaught it looked nice and decided to go down and clean it up.
While she was cleaning it a genie poped out and said, " You may have three wishes."
So she wished that she was beautiful, rich, and for her cat to be transformed into a handsome prince. So, the genie clapped hi hands, she was beautiful, rich, and her handsome prince was stading in front of her with arms wide open. She ran up to him and he whispered in her ear, "Now are you sorry you had me neutered?"
ShrekECPI wrote:
BEAUTIFUL!!! That was too funny.
An original Drunk Irishman joke. I love it, but my Irish Grandmother would beat me senseless if I told her that one.
What do you call six beers and apotato in Dublin?
A seven course meal....
Another Irish Joke.
What's the difference between an Irish Wedding and an Irish Funeral..
one less drunk....
/drinks beer
Grati; "Anyone see a connection between pubs/bars and smugglers??? "
Yeah, I see the connection all right. It's what SWG Smugglers do since they can't smuggle and have to put up with SOE for two years.
What's the difference between the way a Jedi, a BH, and a Smuggler handle a fly in their beer?
The Jedi will demand that a Dev remove the fly.
The BH will pick the fly out of the beer, then crush it under his boot.
The Smuggler will pick up the fly, shake it and say "Spit it out ya wee bassert!!
Gaitan wrote:
What's the difference between the way a Jedi, a BH, and a Smuggler handle a fly in their beer?
The Jedi will demand that a Dev remove the fly.
The BH will pick the fly out of the beer, then crush it under his boot.
The Smuggler will pick up the fly, shake it and say "Spit it out ya wee bassert!!
ROFL that one was great.
He goes to the Sheriff and says, "I got into a terrible wreck! Three lawyers were killed, I'll show you where I buried them..."
The sheriff is worried and says, "What! Are you sure they were dead?"
The gravedigger looks thoughtful. "Well, they said they wasn't; and you know how them fellas lie."
ba-dum-bump.
Message Edited by Khyron42 on 06-17-2005 12:41 PM
I still prefer one someone posted in the... chuckle thread, I think.
How many jedi does it take to shingle a roof?
Depends on how thin ya slice 'em.
Gaitan wrote:
What's the difference between the way a Jedi, a BH, and a Smuggler handle a fly in their beer?
The Jedi will demand that a Dev remove the fly.
The BH will pick the fly out of the beer, then crush it under his boot.
The Smuggler will pick up the fly, shake it and say "Spit it out ya wee bassert!!
Haha! That was a good one!
A man and his wife are laying in bed watching Who Wants to Be a Millionaire.
The husband looks over at his wife and says, "would you like to have sex now?" The wife replies, "No."
A few minutes go by and the husband asks again. Again the wife says no.
The husband then replies, "Is that your final answer?" And the wife nods yes.
So the husband says, "Well then. I would like to phone a friend then."
A man finds a magic lamp one day and rubs it, summoning a Genie.
The Genie tells the man. "You may have one wish, and one wish only. So make it a good one."
The man thinks for a moment and says. "I've always wanted to visit Hawaii, but I'm afraid to fly and I get seasick very easily. So, I wish for you to build me a bridge to Hawaii."
The Genie thinks for a moment and says. "No. I can't do that. It's too much. The length involved, the depth of the ocean, the size of the pilings I'd need..you'll have to ask for something else...something a bit more reasonable. Is there anything else you've always wanted?"
The man thinks for a bit and says "Well there is one other thing. I've always wanted to know everything about women. Why they think the way they think, why they cry when they cry, why they laugh when they laugh. They've always been an enigma and I've never been able to figure them out."
The Genie thinks for a moment and says. "Soooooo....Two lanes? Or four?"