Merchant Archive
Thread: Annoying Customers you want to throw in the Sarlacc Pit
costumer: hey, i thought you sold armor!
me: Yes i do i just put up 5 sets of ubese 15 min ago
costumer: thats not armor!
me:??????
costumer: comp yes, padded maybe, ubese chitn mabri and bone No
What spice was this guy on!!!
a note on people who are broke
I started a rebel alt on Intrepid. well, i started a novice marksman, but tried to get him to rebel. takes 200 faction for this dashing human to be recognized as worthy of joining the rebellion so I started doing the rebel missions. theyre baby level for my baby skills so its no big sweat. problem is, given that it comes at 8 faction per mission, it takes 25 missions to get the needed 200. well, i did all 25. and whaddaya know...I ended up with about 12k credits when it was all over. This done by a character with novice marksman and only 2 levels of rifle. the point im making is, even non crafters/sellers can make good cash in a short time. Those 25 missions took me all of 3 hours. that's probably slow by powergamer standards too. Im not a powergamer. you dont have to be either to make cash. I can think of even better, faster ways to use minor skills to make nice money. All perfectly legit. So, if youre always broke, give some thought to hunting missions and heck even deliver missions to get some starting capital.
the problem people, however, are not those who have no money.... but those who have no money and expect to buy a ton of stuff from you.
Me standing outside Theed starport talking to a image designer trying to get my ears lengthened (well why not if your a Bothan)
random d00d: Hey will u make me full composite?
ME: sorry, I'm not at master yet - half a box of xp to go
random d00d: If I let you teach me skills, will u make full comp?
ME: I have all the AP I need, thanks. I just need to make more armor to get to master.
random d00d: make me a set when u can
ME: I can send you my vendor wp on Corellia. I'll have some on there soon enough.
random d00d: But I need armor to do missions. Whats the best armor u make?
ME: depends what you mean by "Best" - it's a trade off between resistance and HAM costs
random d00d: Can I have sum then?
ME: No
random d00d: u r so tight. u sux
ME: /walks off in direction of harvesters chuckling and shaking head
Some times customers annoy me - I had one guy in my shop while I was crafting, hes lookin around at my stock and suddenly asks
can youcome hunting with me?
I ask why....
Because I need money
so I wondering why hes in my shop if hes broke but I ask him why he doesnt do destroy missions since they are like hunting and pay better.....
Because they take too long
So I ask him if he has tried delivery missions...
They take too long too
So basically this guy wants to waste loads of his time and mine knocking over Rills, Worts and Womp rates for pittance because he thinks that running a mission takes too long!!!
What really threw me though was when he bought a harvester, then realised he needed power so he brough a wind gen - unfortunately my suggestion of finding the best places to put these down (by using the survey tools) was also met with a 'takes too long' and he just threw them down within spitting distance of my house.
But Beggars really get on my nerves. There was this female avatar at the bank. She seemed generally noobish and asking all the usual question, when she asks me, flat out for 500cr. I ask her why and she says its for some clothes, now since I'm all for encouraging some RP (theres not enough IMO) I hand over the cash (pittance really) and she runs away to the bazaar, 2 minutes later shes back asking for another 500cr because she still doesnt have enough (you did read the price first didnt you love?) so like an idiot I hand over another 500cr and to be fair shes back 2 mins later wearing a (new?) dress. Anyway after a while (I'm stood there for a while trying to sell my wares) I notice that shes actually hitting all the players who newly arrive at the bank for cash - so I realise I've been conned out of cash rather than helping a genuine newbie
Oh man, I thought I was the only one....
I took off Helper because people thought I would give them something for nothing. It got really old.
I stay afk when I have my Master Armorsmith title up, so that my afk message sends them to the vendor.
For those that corner me in person, I have a suit of triple kinetic layered composite with HAM totals of 811/741/835 (but with a 69% resist) that I let them look at and then tell them I have lower HAM composite on my vendor. Tends to work...
I'm all for trading one item for another, as long as people don't get some misconcieved notion of false worth. A Holocron is not worth a full set of composite, no matter what you think. Ditto a Nightsister gem or whatever they are. Congrats, you and a large group killed something and your ninja-loot skills are number one, but I'm not trading my house for one.
And people wonder why my alternate character is a gun bunny wannabe...
Please be aware: This is a rant. I have never treated any of my customers to the responses you see below....as far as you know.
"Things are too expensive on this server, you should lower your prices."
- You stipid **edit**! You're NOT going to afford Composite armor and 2 crates of stim packs after being on[server] for 2 days!
"Can you make me a deal?"
- Maybe, how much would you like to buy?
"Oh, I'm in [well known guild], I was thinking for free."
- Get the hell out of my shop you asshat! Do you think that I and the crafters I represent play this game, spend hours grinding, hunting resources and making deals to serve you!?!? How frickin' pompous can you be? No one here 'OWES' you anything! The game has an economy! Work like the rest of us!
--and this goes DOUBLE for anyone, anywhere who thinks they can walk into a town and see (Master [anything]) and ask for a frickin handout! Do you know how easy it is to go earn the 1000 credits you just asked me for? 2 **edit** delivery missions! A survey mission! Whatever! If you don't learn how to do these things, and play with how the game works, you'll NEVER be able to do anything for yourself!
"Hey, you're a master merchant - can I buy a vendor from you?"
- For the ten-thousandth time, **edit**in' NO! Game doesn't work that way.
"Well, can you set up a vendor in my house that I can run and get paid from?"
- Only merchants can manage their vendors! We put in time to get the skills to have vendors - sure the skills suck, BUT THEY'RE OURS!
"Well that's kind of stupid, what good are merchants if they can't set up vendors for people?"
{sound of player choking on his own blood and the tattered remains of an economics text}
"Hi"
- Hi
"Do you sell weapons?"
- Yes (Keep in mind, we're standing in the shop, and the dolt is looking directly at the vendor carrying the big f**kin' gun and labeled PalCorp: Munitions.)
"What kind of gun should I get?"
- I don't know, what skills do you have? (Now at this point, I already recognize the conversation...my nerves are fraying in preparation for the blathering to follow.)
"Which weapon is best? I'll get the skills to use that."
- Well, the choice of weapon is really based on skills. The skills you WORK toward are dependent on what play style you prefer.
"I don't care about that, which is best?"
- I honestly don't know, I'm a merchant, I don't fight a lot.
"But you sell all these guns? You must know which one sells the most. Which one does the most damage? I don't want to look at them all. There's too many. Why do you have so many guns? Do they suck? Are people not buying these because they're crap? Why do you have 5 vendors? Ohhh, armor, what kind of armor should I get? What the hell? Why does this armor cost so much! I'll never have that much money! What kind of a thief are you? You should really change these prices. No one has enough money to buy this stuff..."
- [response deleted due to the inflamatory, blasphemous and possibly universe altering vitriol contained in the remarks.]
"Do you sell [insert ridiculously obscure item here]?"
- No, we don't get a lot of call for that. Usually a custom thing that people go get for themselves.
"What the hell? [player name] has them for sale! Why don't you?"
- Well, if he has them for sale, then good for him. He must have a supplier for them. I congratulate him on being able to provide your needs. You can go to him and get one.
"I don't want to buy one from him, he's too expensive."
- Do you think we'd sell it cheaper?
"Well, yeah! Because I'll buy it from you and not [player name]."
- Oh, So you're a special person that I should sell something below market price for. But not special enough that [player name] would sell it cheaper to.
"Huh?"
- Never mind. I probably can't sell it cheaper, we'd charge a very similar price for that.
"But if you make me a deal, I'll buy it from you."
- I don't even have the item to offer. I'm sorry
"Well go get one! Then you can sell it to me. Duh!"
- Tell you what, I'll go buy it from [player name], add a 20% shipping charge to it, and then sell it to you for a 10% discount off the total.
"Cool, when can I get it"
- [sound of blaster fire]
STOP! My sides hurt.
I swear I'm on starsider all of your customers MUST have accounts here too!
Usually it goes something like this:
Customer: What's your price on [item]
Me: Um, I think it is 12500, but its on the vendor over there you can check.
Customer: Thats too high [another merchant nearby] is selling them for half that.
Me: Oh..then go buy one there.
Customer: He's out.
Me: Well then he isn't selling it for half today then.
Customer: [profanity filtered for your protection]
*Customer Runs out of the store*
Me: (Aloud) Whyam I a merchant again??
--
Customer: I would like to buy one of those disks.
Me: It is on my vendor. Check under Misc / Generic Items
Note my spam macro add said that and had my waypoint....
Customer: Is that far?
Me: It is one of the closest houses to Anchorhead.
Customer: OK, where is it?
Me: I'll send you the waypoint.
Customer: Where is the waypoint?
Me: Check your mail...
A short bit passes
Customer: You do not have any?
Me: I have 3 of each on there.
Customer: I looked through the entire list and I cannot find it.
Me: Did you look under Misc / Generic Items?
Customer: I checked all the items
Me: Did you click next? I have over 300 items on that vendor and it only shows 100 or so. Use the categories, it is quicker.
Customer: oh I already left....
I have had this happen with my power purchasers also, you think those buying 30k+ of power would know how to use categories.
Mihoko-Tailor wrote:
the 10000000000th request for a Agent Smith suit, Neo coat or Ghost white outfit..... argh
Uuuuuuuggggghhhhhhhhh...........................
I love anoying customers, because i enjoy imagining thorwing them in the pit 
My personal favorites are the ones that want to trade something that you are not in the market for. It is almost to the point that I dont do trade in's at all.
*Makes crates of Bofa Treats, gives them funny names like Bantha Bites, and Rancore Yum-yums, markets it all as pet food*
Client: Do you sell pet food for my pet?
Me: Yes all my food is in the vendor.
Client: I know, but I do not have a bantha or a rancore...
*Me falls out of my chair*
LOL this is the first thread that when i got to the end i wanted to hear more lol...but this isnt really merchant stuff but its slicing...
doesnt go exactly like this but along the lines.
Customer: can you slice guns?
Me: yes?
Customer: how about armor.
Me: yup, do you need anything sliced?
At this point the customer will say ether:
A. No I was asking B. can you slice cloths? C.how much?
Customer chose C.
Me: the cost is 2000 credits and discounts if u have me slice more then 2.
Customer: thats too expensive. Some other guy is paying ME to slice MY stuff.
Me: Thats because he is sliceing locked containers.
Customer: Oh... well ill brb i need to do a mision to get money.
-----------TIME PASSES-----------------
Customer: I have 2000 credits now.
Me: ok bring your gun to me.
Customer walks up to me and puts gun in window and asked what does slicing do.
I explain to him and he accepts trade and i slice his gun, which was a CDEF. /slap
The slice was a 8% slice... I know thats low but its random...
The guy starts ranting and saying that nothing happend to his gun...
I think there is evenm a poston the boards saying that I cheated him out of money.
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Man i could slap every person that complains and blames me for a low slice.
AHHH i feel better now : )