Smuggler Archive
Thread: Han Solo vs Captain Kirk
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Ternque01
Wed Nov 10, 2004 2:43 pm
#1
Han Solo, Captain Kirk in a no-holds hand-to-hand fight.
I got 5 credits on Solo.
Message Edited by Ternque01 on 11-10-2004 03:44 PM
Datink_Nieleft
Wed Nov 10, 2004 2:47 pm
#2
Hmm,..as much as I am fan of Han..I gotta go with Capt. Kirk. Not just any Kirk, but "Ripped Shirt Kirk". You know the one.
The guy has a Judo chop that can take down a Gorn. Then he has the double fist bash he uses on Klingons. And he gets a lot of females, even alien ones.
Not knocking Han, I mean he has the Falcon and Princess Leia. And not to forget a co-pilot that can rip your arms off.
But I have to go with the Kirk on this. If you did Enterprise vs. Falcon, I'd go with the Falcon on cool factor alone.
Ternque01
Wed Nov 10, 2004 2:57 pm
#3
LOL, I know. Ripped-ShirtKirk would rip his ass a new one.
But still, we overlook the weakness of Kirk: his moves are too slow. Star Trek fight coreagraphy is horrendous. Han could land two to three punches after Kirk blocks the first. Too slow, too choppy... Plus, Kirk will try to get Solo into a gay wrestling match - you know, the ones where they hold eachothers arms and stumble back and forth. Solo would kick him in the groin. Solo would fight dirty.. something Kirk's classical training might not leave him too keen on doing.
On the other hand, Kirk is expertly trained in pressure points and strike locations on the human anatomy. There is a reason he Judo chops to the neck.
For all it's worth, I'd pay money to see Solo blast the living hell out of Kirk with his DL-44, Kirk's dead body hitting the ground in a dead, dull thud. Priceless.
yimaz
Wed Nov 10, 2004 3:18 pm
#4
Ahhhhh! Damn you I cant deside....hmmmm....
Han was cooler for sure but Kirk was a bad arse back when he had hair. It would close fight and kirks shirt would for sure be ripped, sadly I would have to give it to Kirk but it would be way, way close.
On a side note anyone know what the T in James T. Kirk stood for?
-Tiberius-
Ternque01
Wed Nov 10, 2004 3:29 pm
#5
yimaz wrote:
Han was cooler for sure but Kirk was a bad arse back when he had hair.
AHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!! At least it didn't read, "but Kirk was a bad arse when he had back hair!" Ahhh, good times 
JacobKell
Wed Nov 10, 2004 4:06 pm
#7
Damnit!
Well have to put the money on kirk,always been more ofa trek fan than a 'wars fan so im afraid i have to side with my fave franchise...
Besides realistcly lets look at the arsenal available to each combatant- kirk as we have already established,has the patented kirk judo chop,the amazing ripped shirt and least we forget the patented flying kirk kick(a kick shatner claims in his autobiography he performed himself,strange always looked like a stuntman who bore no resemblance to shatner to me,but who am i to argue with the legend that is kirk...)now as for solo what special attacks are available to him...?
None,his specials are either nerfed or non existant,and until his profesion gets some love kirks gonna pwn his arse every time
Whats next? Janeway vs Yoda?
Ternque01
Wed Nov 10, 2004 4:16 pm
#8
JacobKell wrote:
Damnit!
Well have to put the money on kirk,always been more ofa trek fan than a 'wars fan so im afraid i have to side with my fave franchise...
Besides realistcly lets look at the arsenal available to each combatant- kirk as we have already established,has the patented kirk judo chop,the amazing ripped shirt and least we forget the patented flying kirk kick(a kick shatner claims in his autobiography he performed himself,strange always looked like a stuntman who bore no resemblance to shatner to me,but who am i to argue with the legend that is kirk...)now as for solo what special attacks are available to him...?
None,his specials are either nerfed or non existant,and until his profesion gets some love kirks gonna pwn his arse every time
Whats next? Janeway vs Yoda?
That's a great ascertainment of Kirk. Hmm I think a great fight would be between Spock and Chewbacca. Spock has superhuman strength and can take alot of damage. He also has keen anatomical knowlege (Vulcan Death Grip).
Chewbacca on the other hand has even more strength, can take more damage, and has an attitude waaayy bigger than Spock. Chewy makes up for a lack of accuracy and precision-targeted striking with sheer size and limb-ripping ability.
Let's discount Spocks mind powers unless Chewbacca is kept still in a pin.
JacobKell
Wed Nov 10, 2004 5:49 pm
#9
Ternque01 wrote:
Hmm I think a great fight would be between Spock and Chewbacca. Spock has superhuman strength and can take alot of damage. He also has keen anatomical knowlege (Vulcan Death Grip).
.
See my sad knowledge of trek come into play,no such thing as the vulcan death grip,it was the vulcan nerve pinch
All this reminds me of a comedy/post/forum site i read a while back that pitted various sci fi icons againsnt one another(forget the url)
Featured such legendary battles as the enterprise vs the death star or buck rogers vs darth vader etc
One final pwnage point in kirks favour...his sexual prowess,kirk would probably have judo chopped,flying kicked solo aside then legged it to the bedroom with leia....
fishbrains
Wed Nov 10, 2004 5:50 pm
#10
I think the thing we are all forgetting is that while Kirk may have been smooth and a bad ass Han also has Lando in his corner and he more than cancells out the smooth factor of Kirk.(Those who frequent these forums may notice that I am something of a Lando fan. Sometimes my GF get's mad at me when drinking something/anything I will randomly say 'God DAMN! that's some good Colt 45!'
kidding)
Ternque01
Wed Nov 10, 2004 6:27 pm
#12
LOL, that's my quote of the day for sure: "God DAMN! that's some good Colt 45!"
I also got called for inappropriate use of the word "Vulcan Death Grip". My skills are waning...
FrankLee
Wed Nov 10, 2004 6:27 pm
#13
Kirk rulez.
Solo was a _good_ mechanic, but Kirk made a gun out of some dirt and a cardboard tube.
Solo hung out with the princess of a dead planet, but Kirk hung out with a dead Abraham Lincoln.
Solo got to bang the chick in the sandbarge-bikini, Kirk banged just about every chick on every planet.
I think Chewy would take Spock though, unless Spock got to talk first. If Spock got whip out some logic before Chewy got his arms ripped off, then everybody would be looking at everyone else and trying to pretend that they each understood what Spock had just said.
Solo was a _good_ mechanic, but Kirk made a gun out of some dirt and a cardboard tube.
Solo hung out with the princess of a dead planet, but Kirk hung out with a dead Abraham Lincoln.
Solo got to bang the chick in the sandbarge-bikini, Kirk banged just about every chick on every planet.
I think Chewy would take Spock though, unless Spock got to talk first. If Spock got whip out some logic before Chewy got his arms ripped off, then everybody would be looking at everyone else and trying to pretend that they each understood what Spock had just said.
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