Smuggler Archive
Thread: If they had a respec in the movies...
I rarely laugh at this kind of stuff in RL, but this one was just too damn good 
making the couch and the 2 hr duel were priceless
Ep. 5 - The Empire Respecs Back....
Han: Has commander Skywalker checked in yet?
Deck Officer: I have no idea, I respecd out of ranger cause I got hungry *hands Han a piketa pie* Its possible he came in through the south enterance and forgot to check in.
Han: Not likely. Are the speeders ready?
Deckk officer: yes, but we cant find a 4/4/4/4 pilot to fly one.
Han: Damn, I respeced to BH, so I cant fly one either. We will have to go out on taun taun.
Deck officer: You cant go out there, your taun taun will freze before you reach the first marker.
Han: Well, then I will see you in .... wait.... Damn, I cant train the mount and cant respec for another 8 hrs. I guess I cant go after him.
Deck officer: Wait Han! The princess respecd to CH after being attacked by that thing in the trash compacter, ask her.
**Han gets the princess to train the mount and goes out after Luke...he finds him a few hrs later**
Han: Luke! Give me a sign here.
Blue Glowy Ben: Han, Luke is dead... He is only a padawan and his post CU saber is a piece of crap...He was unable to solo the CL 82 Hoth Monster.
Han: Damn, I guess we are just SOL then.
Blue GLowy Ben: No, take him to a doc and get him rezed, that is if you can finda master doc post-cu. First though, cut open the taun taun with luke's saber to keep him warm.
Han:I dont have a cert in that weapon, hell i cant even hold it let alone use it.
Blue Glowy Ben: I will put the saber in a droid and then give you the droid, you can use it that way.
Han: No! I heard you can get banned for that. Wait...I have a survival knife I can use *cuts open the taun taun* Ben, I cant get him inside, I dont have the scouting skills necessary to harvest the meat to get itout of the way.
Blue Glowy Ben: No problem, I respecd to scout so I could gather resources for Yoda. *Ben puts luke inside*
Han: Why does Yoda need resources?
Blue GLowy Ben: Yoda needs resources so he can sell them to Chewy so he can continue to make blue couches. Yoda respecd to master merchant so he could pay the maint on his house.
**the next morning, in the med center at the rebel base**
Deck officer: I got Luke into the bata tank but the damn med droid is refusing to work on him.
Han: Dont you know that med droids are useless post CU? We need a master doc or master CM to res him.
Deck officer: A master? good luck... Everyone respecd out of that. The best we have is a 4/0/0/0 doc.
Han: Luke is gonna be pissed then. After he clones, he is gonna have lost a ton of jedi xp.
Deck officer: Its not gonna be that bad.... the tkm/mpike/doc4/0/0/0 can cure his wounds and he will get the xp back in no time, considering we have 2x xp unitl the end of the month.
Han: What good is 2x xp again? Everyone I know already exploited that along with the respec to complete their templates.
Deck officer: Well, thats true. Its not useful to most of us but it does help produce more jedi and increase their skills much faster.
Han: Well, I guess the young padawans deserve something considering their post cu sabers are crap and 90% of everyone in the universe is hunting them.
Deck officer: /nod I think we should all respec to MBH/MRifles and go hunt that thing that killed Luke.
Han: Great idea, but I cant respec for another 3 hours.... Can you wait for me?
Deck officer: Sure I can wait for you...How about another piece of my pie while we wait?
Everyone asked for more....
So I took a shot at it
Mott_Kruger wrote:
/omg;/lmao;/grabswindexandpapertowelandcleanscokeoffofmonitor
Yes, what Mott said...
LOL best post ever!
*****
going to have company!
LUKE: Hurry! Let's go... wait.. WTH is Chewie doing now?
HAN: I, uh, ummm... might be mistaken, but I, uh... think he is making a large couch.
LUKE: Son of a...
*Luke feigns death*
I swear, I just pee'd a lil.
ROFL....
Hey you know if they had respec in the movies then Han would have respeced to a BH, taken the bounty on himself, caught himself, turned himself in for the reward and then used the reward to pay off his debt to Jabba, then respec (after 12 hours of course) back to Smuggler.
Of course that pretty much would have ended the movie and any subsequent episodes right there.
- Samm
i r want more lolWOW!!!! Your second stories are funny as **** too
You have a nack!!!
Oh... and I respec'd to MBH/M.Rifles, hahahaha.
PS: F*@k Skywalker for getting FD nerfed!