Ranger Archive
Thread: Animosity between rangers and commandos when will it stop
An Antarian Ranger was on vacation in the depths of Dathomir and he wanted a pair of genuine Rancor boots in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the Ranger shouted, "maybe I'll just go out and get my own Rancor so I can get a pair of shoes made at a reasonable price!"
The vendor said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you will run into a couple of Commandos who were in here earlier saying the same thing."
So the Ranger headed into the wilderness that same day and a few hours later came upon two men standing in thick dense jungle. He thought, "those must be the two Commandos the guy in town was talking about." Just then, the Ranger saw a tremendously Big Rancor running rapidly towards one of the Commandos.
Just as the Rancor was about to attack, the Commando grabbed its neck with both hands and strangled it to death with very little effort. Then both Commandos dragged it to a clearing and flipped it on its back. Laying nearby were several more of the creatures.
One of the Commandos then exclaimed, "Damn, this one doesn't have any shoes either!"
On another note and all jokes aside, i can see this game and the GCW becoming very interesting after this round of revamps with each profession complementing each other and each profession having a defined role (hopefully) . And it will also be good to see the whole heavy infantry(commando) vs Light infantry(ranger) debate go on on who is better ...much like in RL
jarger22 wrote:
One of the Commandos then exclaimed, "Damn, this one doesn't have any shoes either!"
I'm curious what verbal fights Rangers and Commandos will have on the battlefield - it's just classic.
Olsson wrote:
An Imperial Regiment Commander had a suicide mission to be performed, so he called in his three best soldiers, a Stormtrooper, a Ranger and a Commando. He explained the details of the mission emphasizing the volunteer would not be coming back but also explained that because of this, he would allow the men to ask for large payment in compensation. He then asked each man what his price would be. The Stormtrooper spoke up and said, "one million dollars so I can give it to my wife and kids to make sure their always taken care of." The Commander nodded and then the Ranger spoke up. "I would ask for 2 million dollars so I could give 1 million to my family, and another million to my fellow Rangers I will be leaving behind." Again the Commander nodded in approval of the motives. Finally he turned to the Commando who loudly declared "I'll need 3 million dollars." "Why that amount?" asked the Commander. "So I can put a million dollars in the bank and send the Ranger" came the reply.
ROFLMAO
HAHAHAHAHA keep em coming gotta love laughing
the night. TheRanger looks up and says, "When you see all the
stars in the sky, what do you think, sir?"
The Commando LT replies, "Well, I think of how insignificant we really are in the
universe; how small a piece of such a grand design. I can't help but wonder
if what we do truly means anything or makes any difference. Why? What do
you think of, Sergeant?"
"I think somebody stole the damn tent."
The CO was curious so he sent acommando up to see what was going on.
As the commando approached the ranger sprinted into the woods, and thecommando followed.
Yelling and screaming could be heard coming from the woods, seconds later the Ranger stepped out and stood back at attention.
The CO was still curious so he sent a squad up to investigate.
The ranger ran into the woods and after some yelling and screaming, came back out and stood at attention again.
Now the CO was angry so he sent an entire Platoon up to the top of the hill.
The ranger ran into the woods.
He emerged moments later after sime more yelling and screaming with no sign of thecommandos anywhere.
The CO had had enough, he sent the entire battalion ofcommandos charging up the hill.
The ranger ran into the woods. More yelling and screaming and this time some gunfire.
Finally a terribly woundedcommando crawled out of the woods and reported back to the CO.
The CO inquired "Do you mean to tell me that oneranger destroyed an entire battalion of commandos"
Thecommando replied "no sir, it was a trick, there were two of them"
A young Imperial Commando Lieutenant needed to make a phone call, and was searching his pockets for some spare credits as a Ranger walks by.
- Hey, Ranger, do you have some spare creds for a phone call?
- Sure, just relax and I'll take a look.
- WHAT? Don't you know how to address a superior? Do it again, and do it correct! Do you have any spare change to make a phone call?
- SIR, NO, SIR!!!
---
The new Imperial Commando recruit came back after doing some tests, which he had failed, and actually done the worst performance in the history of the regiment.
- I am terribly sorry Sir, that I failed Sir. I feel like going somewhere and put a bullit in my head.
- Do it, just make sure that you bring enough bullets.
---
jarger22 wrote:
Two Commando’s boarded a quick shuttle flight out of Mos Eisley, headed for Bestine. One sat in the window seat, the other sat in the middle seat.
Just before take-off, A Ranger got on and took the aisle seat next to the two Commandos. The Ranger kicked off his boots, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Commando in the window seat said,"I think I'll get up and get a Vasarian Brandy."
"No problem," said the Ranger, "I'll get it for you." While he was gone, the Commando picked up the Rangers boot and spit in it.
When the Ranger returned with the Vasarian Brandy, the other Commando said, "That looks good, I think I'll have one too."
Again, the Ranger obligingly went to fetch it and while he was gone, the commando picked up the other boot and spit in it.
The Ranger returned and they all sat back and enjoyed the short flight to Bestine.
As the shuttle was landing, the Ranger slipped his feet into his boots and knew immediately what had happened.
"How long must this go on?" Ranger asked. "This fighting between our groups? This hatred? This animosity? This spitting in boots and pissing in Drinks?"
LOL.. nice.
I've been laughing non-stop!
See, this is what we needed the whole time, instead of all the arguing of who's getting what, when we'll kick ass working together. 
Keep the jokes coming!
A Ranger walks up to a commando in a bar and says "I bet you 100,000 credits I can urinate in that glass from 10 m without spilling a drop"
The Commando says "Sure, I will take that bet!"
The Ranger sets his feet, checks the windspeed and direction, carefully aims, and.............. proceeds to urinate all over the bar, up and down the commando, over his face, everywhere but the glass.
The Commando laughs and says "Disgusting, but im rich now, where is my money?"
The Ranger says "I will just get it!" and walks over to a Smuggler playing pool. The smuggler looks at the urine-soaked bar and laughing commando and hands something to the Ranger.
The Ranger comes back to the Commando and promptly pays him his money and the Commando asks, "What was that with the Smuggler about?"
The Ranger replied "Oh, I just bet him 500,000 credits I could piss all over you and you wouldnt just like it, youd sit there smiling!"