Merchant Archive
Thread: Annoying Customers you want to throw in the Sarlacc Pit
Some types of customers I get:
1. The Non-Understanding
"i am a doc and musican and a brawler what kind of amor sould i wear"
"Well, it depends on what type of fighting you do. Do you PvP a lot, or do you PvE a lot?"
"well i dont do pvp"
"Okay, so you would probably need kinetic composite armor then"
"well i am wearing it now but it seems like it take more mind to heal ppl and more action to do musican"
NOTE: Here, we begin to see signs that the customer does not know what they want, and does not know of to express what they want very well. You must be careful to determine what they want, or you will risk craft items that are several times the value of the item that you sell before you finnaly figure out what they want.
"Well, yes. Wearing armor brings down your stats that recharge your HAM, and the ones that reduce the amount of points it takes to perform an action"
NOTE: Attempt to educate the customer without resorting to abusive comments!
"o ya and what sould i put my stat to"
NOTE: When customers go outside your experience line, attempt to respond in a manner that corrosponds with your experience field. Do not guess, or you risk newbies dying, which while very funny, does not establish a good newby base.
"To wear most composite armor whole, you would have to get a buff, or get some with VERY low encumbrance"
"But it should be heavy on the 2nd and 3rd stats on your HAM"
"Like quickness, strength, focus, etc..."
"well i chage my stats"
NOTE: Beware of non-informative comments. Try to respond in a non-abusive manner.
"What did you change them to?"
"o ya str is at 570"
NOTE: While this is not completely un-informative, see previous comment.
"You should be able to wear Ubese armor if your strength, constitution, quickness, stanima, etc are high, as well as some pieces of composite. You will have to have a buff in all stats if you wish to wear a complete set of composite armor usually."
"i have comp amor on now but sould i keep my stat are change them"
NOTE: If customer repeats question you answered, try to respond again in a different way. Maybe they will understand it them.
"Well, that is all up to you. Regardless of your stats, you will probably have to get a buff to wear a complete suit of composite armor if you want really good stats on it"
NOTE: If you have other business to attend to, try diverting them to the articles that are in the knowledge base that relate to the thing you are discussing.
"I suggest reading knowledge base article soe9660 for more information on armor encumbrance"
"Article soe7587 is also good too"
"well as a doc musicanand brawler ****** said somthing about ubese"
NOTE: As seen in this, it is not a good idea to bring up other topics of conversation, as this will extend your conversation.
"Yes, that is some armor that can have decent kinetic resists, yet you can still usually wear it without a buff."
"ok"
NOTE: When the "ok" is reached, you will:
1. Recieve an order|1/10|
2. Recieve a good bye |1/10|
3. Recieve more questions |9/10|
NOTE: Make sure that you give them a vendor location, as this will reduce orders by tell, and give them options.
"If you are interested in armor, I have a vendor on Talus that you may view that has all sorts of armor on it, including Ubese, and kinetic Composite"
"ok where at"
NOTE: Make sure that you send the waypoint in an e-mail, because they will not understand the complicated system of typing in /wayp **** ****.
"I have sent it to you in an e-mail"
"and do the knowlede base have any articles about multiabe clases like a doc musican and a combat profession"
"I do not think so... What kind of information were you looking for about them?"
"like for a doc, a musican and a brawler what sould my stat migration be at"
NOTE: When all else fails, tell them that they are the only ones to decide.
"Well, that is all up for you to decide. There is no set standard for them"
"There may be some settings that work better than others, but it is all up to you"
"ok"
NOTE: The customer now chooses an option
"is ubese amor better for doc and muscian"
NOTE: The customer has chosen option 3
"It is not really better, just another armor choice. Sometimes it be easier to use, but not offer the same stats as Composite armor"
"ok do yall have any doctors there that has a combat pro too"
"There are not any currently on at the moment"
"what amor does he wear"
NOTE: Answer questions like this with a short response that gives no room for speculation.
"Composite, usually"
"ok"
NOTE: The customer chooses an option.
"well what the encumbrance be"
NOTE: The customer chooses option 3
"I am not sure what his encumbrance on his armor is, or what is stats are. You would have to ask him. It is different for every player, and every piece of armor"
NOTE: Remind them of your vendor constantly
"I have some composite armor that might suit you on my vendor. They are all labeled."
"ok are they at new cornet"
"Yes"
"i dont have the money do you think i can trade this comp amor for it"
NOTE: Avoid trade ins at all cost!!! Do not respond with abusive comments
"Hmmm... I usually don't do trade ins, but if it is good un-used composite armor, then I might consider it... What are the stats and condition on it, please?"
"ok condition is 24695 and 80 kane 73 ele and the rest is 65"
"Is this a complete set of armor, or just a few pieces? Also, what is the max condition on it?"
"ya the max is 36361"
"Ack, that armor has been used quite a bit... I'm afraid that I couldn't re-sell it... Sorry... You might want to look at my Ubese armor, which is cheaper."
NOTE: The customer may become abusive at this point. Not always, but sometimes.
"Or, you could try just buying a few pieces of armor. There is nothing that says you have to buy a complete suit"
"ok i need to get some money from ***** account brb"
NOTE: Disaster averted.
"i have 26000"
NOTE: Customers with low credit will either try to bargin with you, or come back another time. It is usually the former.
"Hmmm... Well, I hope that you are able to earn enough credits for armor soon! With doctor, that shouldn't be too hard"
"do yousee what i mean my maind goes too fast"
NOTE: Eh?
The customer does not respond part this part, and the encounter is over. No items have been sold.
2. The Unsure Customer
"hey can you make my cloths"
"Sure! What kind would you like?"
"im not sure can i see them all"
NOTE: This is the first sign that they do not know what they want.
"Well, I cannot really show you the clothing until I craft it. If you could give me a theme and color that you want, I might be able to put something together"
"black"
NOTE: Black is the universal cool color. Sometimes, you don't even have to ask the color. Note that they didn't answer the entire question here...
"or gray"
"Is there some type of theme you want to go with this color?"
NOTE: Although, this usually doesn't work, sometimes it helps to ask...
"lol"
"black with a brown belt"
NOTE: Does not narrow it down much...
"some kind jedi cloth"
NOTE: There is not clothing called "Jedi Clothing"
"Hmmmm... Okay, so you want something Jedi-ish. How about a black cloak, black pocketed work pants, black gloves, black uniform boots, black sidebutton shirt, and the brown belt you suggested?"
"i dont know maybe gray"
NOTE: Most suggestions are reject, so it usually does not help to give one.
"can u made different clothes so i can cgoose?"
"Well, what kind of clothing do you want to choose from? I'm sorry, but I only know that you want something gray, and Jedi, and that does not give me much to go off of..."
"some kins of jedi clothes"
NOTE: /sigh
"Yes, but I mean, do you want a cloak? What kind of pants do you want? What kind of shirt do you want? Do you want a robe for it all? Gloves? There is nothing that is directly Jedi related. Nothing with Jedi in the name."
"no cloak no robe"
NOTE: Okay, so we know that he does NOT want a cloak or robe. Making a little bit of progress here.
"Okay, no cloak, no robe. Do you want a shirt, gloves, pants, belt, and boots?"
"righttt.."
"Okay, then let's expand from there. What do you want these to look like? A rugged Jedi warrior? A stealthy Jedi assasian? Etc..."
NOTE: About 10 minutes pass from this point
"Hello?"
"sorry?"
"I was waiting for your response"
"jedi warrior"
"Okay! I have an idea of something you might want then! If you could come to my shop at -525, -2109 (Talus), please, I'm sure that we can work something out! I'll craft a suit in the meantime, and when you get here, we'll see how you like it. If it's not your style, I can change it to however you want."
"send me a attach ment plz"
"where it is"
"tatooine?"
NOTE: Not reading the origional post.
"I have sent you an attachment, it should be arriving in your e-mail shortly"
"No, it is on Talus"
"i be there later"
"im in tattoine getting badges"
"When do you estimate you shall arrive here? I shall be logging off in a little bit"
"how much i got to travel?"
"1 ticket or 2?"
"If I remember right, it should be 2"
"how much cost me?"
"Hmmm... Well, I would say it would cost a couple K. It won't cost much to go to Talus, but that big jump from Tatooine to Corellia might be a few K..."
"how much will cost me?"
"I'm sorry... Are you talking about the suit, or the travel ticket totals?"
"the clothes"
NOTE: Spelled "clothes" right.
"Well, that depends on what you decide to get when you come here"
"how much cost normally"
"around"
"It can cost anwhere from a couple thousand up. It all depends on what you decide to get. From what you are talking about though, I would say only around two to four or five thousand"
"k so 5k?"
"Well, for the one that I'm making right now, it would only be about 3.5 K"
"im doing 1 more mission"
"Okay"
"when u r a jedi can keep being artisan?"
"Yes you can, to a certain extent. It all depends on how far you want to take your Jedi. If you want to do it all the way, then you might have to drop it. If you only want to do a bit, then you should be able to keep it."
"which one is closer talus imp outpost"
"whioch one?"
"Dearic is closer"
NOTE: Customer enters shop
"hi"
"cool"
"i was looking at the cstuff"
NOTE: About 10 minutes of pointless discussion, and herding him to the suit I made.
"Well, this is it right here"
"nop"
"Was there something else you had in mind?"
"i dont know"
"the brawlers use it a lot"
"the clothes i want"
"Does it have flaps on the front of it?"
"flapS?"
"it is all black"
"with a brown belt"
"Is this a vest?"
"That one right there?"
NOTE: Uses /pointat
"no"
"the other one"
"This one?"
"ya"
"how u point?"
NOTE: 5 minutes to explain how to point
"Was it a decorative vest?"
"lother one"
"Did it look anything like this? This is a vest that a lot of melee professions use"
"let m see here"
NOTE: He procedes to look at my vendor, and buy a smock.
"A smock?"
"??"
"a?"
"like those...."
"i like that one"
"the red one too"
NOTE: He is referring to a doctor's dress. He said he didn't want a robe in the first place.
"Hmmm..Let me see..."
"How about this, then?"
NOTE: Show doctor's dress
"this one"
NOTE: Points at a Jedi uniform that I have on display. Comes with cloak, and in a completely different color than he wanted.
"give me the res of what im wearing"
"boots"
"i need boots"
"and gloves"
"jedi pants"
"Okay, just a minute, please"
NOTE: A friend comes in, and he procedes to try and heal him, even though he is not damage. Friend looks at him strangely, and tries to point this out. No effect.
"u have it?"
"i ll craft something"
"brb"
NOTE: He proceds to start to run out of the shop
"Okay, I have completed the rest of the uniform"
"Wait!!!"
NOTE: Fortunatly, he turns around, and comes back.
"k"
"how much"
"3,000, please"
NOTE: I go into the trade window
"those r not jedi pants"
"Those are the ones on the display"
"bui dont want the pants"
NOTE: Refrain from decking customer
"but i want the rest"
FRIEND: Shall I kick him in the 'nads?
"Okay, let me do the trade again..."
"how much?"
NOTE: I'm still not over-charging him. I'll take it down 1,000 to please him.
"2,000 now, please"
"k"
"that is not the cost"
"but i dont care"
"Why is it not the cost?"
NOTE: This is a fair price for what he bought. A little bit under, too.
"i can made it"
NOTE: Refrain from screaming next comment out
"Well, why didn't you make it yourself?"
"bc i didt know"
NOTE: Pull hair
"k"
"cya"
Message Edited by Trance750 on 09-09-2004 04:16 AM
I gotta give him credit for at least being original....not like the other "hey can I have 1 or 2k" beggars.
SpinnerSWG wrote:
Ok, Here's a short story about a seller (a bit different, I know!).
I just bought a black infiltration suiton the bazaar for 3000credits. At least on my server, these can go for5000credits on the private vendors so I think getting them for 3000 on the bazaar is a good deal.
So, I'm standing by the bazaar terminalin my new infiltration suit, crafting some goods to sell on the bazaar. The seller of the infiltration suit (let's call him Dood) comes up to me and says:
Dood: Dude!
Dood:Could you tip me 2000credits?
(Long silence as I purposefully ignore this guy, whoseems to bebegging.)
Dood: You know, those usually sell for 5000credits, so I'll need 2000credits more.
(Silence.)
Dood: It was meant for someone else, so you need to pay me the extra credits.
(I'm really confused now...my curiosity gets the better of me.)
Me: What are you talking about?
Dood:Theinfiltration suit.
Me: But I bought it on the bazaar.
Dood: I know. It was meant for someone else but you bought it, so I'll need the extra credits now.
Me: /ignore
imadork wrote:
i ended up tipping him 10K figuring that would be enough to get a noob started
Message Edited by Robes268 on 09-13-2004 09:11 AM
Customer: Hi! I've been told that you can make chowder from my friends. I need 25 crates.
Keep in mind, I'm an armorsmith/tailor.
Me: Errr... I'm sorry, but I am not a chef.I cannot make chowder.
Customer: But my friends told me you could
Me: They must have been miss-informed
Customer: You don't have to be rude mister
Me: I'm not trying to be rude, I'm just stating what I know.
Customer: Okay, then I want something pink and furry for Wookies, and 5 crates of taters
Me: I'm sorry, but I cannot make either of those. I do not know of anything "pink and furry" for Wookies, and I am still not a chef.
Customer: You don't have to be rude mister
At this point, I begin to get suspicious...
Me: I an make you something that is similar to something furry for Wookies to wear, but not exactly.
Customer: I WANT MY CHOWDER!!!!!11!!!1!11
Me: ......