Merchant Archive
Thread: Annoying Customers you want to throw in the Sarlacc Pit
My favourite to-date is a recent customer. He came to my shop looking for houses - he had grand plans to build a mini-city. After a little haggling, he agreed to buy 15 medium houses.
I contracted the walls to an up-and-coming architect, and had the order ready in two days.
That was over a week ago.
Now, having a good stock of mediums isn't a hardship to me; they'll sell eventually, and the grinding XP helped. But we're talking about a 500K order, and this guy just backs out without even a response to my email.
No class. 
Ok, not a merchant, but deals directly with merchant trade.
Background:
Me: Master Bio Engineer - 0 merchant skills, not even business 3.
Sell wholesale to a Merchant who re-sells my pets out of Ackeko's Pet Shop
Never wore my flag. Got tired of spending 90% of my gaming time responding to tells with /r no, I cant make that, if you want to know what I can make, look on the far left side of the Bio Engineer skill tree. It lists all of the pets I can make. Also, I can make the master lvl pets. (made a macro for that one - best part was hitting that 3 or 4 times in a row for the same person hehe) I sold all of my pets on reputation alone. Being one of the first master BE's, I ended up having to tripple my prices just so I could keep up with demand.
Customer: Can you make ______?
Me: Yes, I have a guy that sells them at xxxx, xxxx out of kaadara on naboo or xxxx, xxxx out of moenia.
Customer: What are the stats for _____?
Me: (Give approximation, explain that every pet is different, go look on vendor... yadda yadda yadda)
.... 10 minutes pass
Customer: Dude, there aren't any on your vendor.
Me: Technically, its not my vendor, its owned by (so and so) and I know he has stock of that pet, you'll need to send him an email and ask him to let you know when its for sale on the vendor. He's usually on this time of night, so it shouldn't be long.
Customer: Well I want one now, so come put one on the vendor so I can buy it.
Me: I would if I could, but its not my vendor. Its owned by (so and so) who buys my pets from me and re-sells them.
Customer: Well make one and come bring it to me.
Me: I don't do that. I only sell wholesale to merchants. I'm sure (so and so) will be on soon, and he will be happy to place one on the vendor for you.
Customer: That's dumb. Why can't you just come here and put one on the vendor? I'll pay you extra
Me: Even if I make one, fly there and stand right next to the vendor, I still can't put the item on there, its not my vendor.
(Here's where it REALLY goes down hill)
Customer: But it says Ackeko's pet shop
Me: Yes, it does. But the vendor belongs to (so and so)
Customer: It says Ackeko's pet shop, its your vendor.
Me: No, it's not my vendor, and if you look on the vendor at any one of the items, you will see that they are all placed by (so and so), not me. I can't help you, sorry.
Customer: thats stupid! why would it be called ackekos pet shop if its not your vendor?
Me: Because thats what (so and so) wanted to name it. I can't do anything about it.
Customer: why dont you change the name then if it isnt your vendor?
Me: Not my house either. Same guy owns the house and the vendor
Customer: your f***ing retarded! if it says ackekos pet shop then its your f***ing vendor!
Me: No, and if you look up in your chat, you'll see that I have told you MULTIPLE times who owns the vendor, who will sell you the pet, and who owns the house.
Customer: your a f***ing as***le! why are you such a f***ing **edit**? why would somebody name there house ackekos pet shop if they arent ackeko you f***ing retard???
Me: Im retarded? It seems to me that your the one having trouble understanding the VERY simple fact that I DO NOT OWN THE F***ING VENDOR!!! I couldnt sell you something off of it even if I wanted too!
Customer: f*** you! im not buying your worthless s**t anyways! And your so full of s**t about everything! you dont even know how to use a vendor!! ha! youre a f***ing idiot!!
Me: What? What the.... nevermind. Here's the deal buddy. Obviously, if I were to help you out even in the slightest right now, it would mean nothing but pain and suffering for me in the future. You are one of the stupidest people I have met in this game, and it is my privelege to inform you that after being in this game for 3 months, you are the FIRST person on my ignore list!! CONGRATS!!
True story. I will never forget that conversation. It was shortly after that day that I retired from making pets altogether.
Anyone have this happen?
On my custom order vendor, I place a backpack with 4 AUK crates inside (25 units per crate). This is a custom order. Someone else buys the backpack, removes 5 units per crate, then offers the backpack to my vendor at the original price he/she paid. Really, now...did they think I wouldn't notice? Sheesh..
Ok, I may not be a merchant, but as a Master CH... I get stuff to this effect...
Random /tell: Can u train me pet?
Me: Where are you?
Customer: Mining Outpost
Me: Ok, come to my I'm at (player city name) we havea shuttle port.
Customer: Can u come to me?
Me: I guess, but it's 5k to train and you'll have to pay my travel expense.
Customer: u dont train free?
Me: No
Customer F*** you.
Me: /addignore
And I get this a few times per week! I feel all of your pain!
Amusing sub-note:
I repair weapons for free. Why? Because I'm stupid and I don't like money. (Or at least so I was told by a customer. lol)
Anyway, word has slowly spread from my customers that know this, to others who hadn't heard and I've started to receive at least a tell a night that goes something like this:
C: You repair weapons?
Me: Yes I do, if you bring me your weapon I'll repair it for you.
C: I'm on Endor, can you come?
Me: Ummm... no. Unfortunately, I spend most of my time at my shop working on special orders and items for my vendor, but if you bring it to my shop it's a free repair.
C: Can you come to Endor?
Me: (decides to 'miss' seeing that tell in the window)
The other iteration of course is the one where I'm out dealing with harvesters, and have my 3 line AFK message up and someone wants me to come back to Naboo for a repair.
--------
But my new favorite. Someone comes to me the other night wantinga Krayt flamethrower. I'm actually not busy as I'd just started three factory runs, my harvesters were all happy and I wasn't running off to go to bed. So I'm amenable to it. The problem is he only has 4 Krayt tissues, and a FT needs 5 (4 power handlers, and 1 for the handler schematic).
What ensues is a 20 minute conversation, the upshot of which is him trying to convince me to use an exploit so that I can use his tissues in a gun. Which I decline to do (duh). Finally I get furstrated to the point where I say
C: What if I gave you the credits that extra tissue would have cost, so it wouldn't really mess up the economy? The tissues worth at least 100K
Me: Ummmm... No.
C: What if I gave you 300K.
Me: Ummmm... No.
C: Can you recommend someone who would do it?
Me: No.
C: I'm starting not to like you.
Me: Ummmm No. I'm not going to participate in an exploit that helped wreck the game's economy, and I'm not going to facilitate you doing so by recommending someone you might be able to bribe into doing it. Beyond that I don't know anyone else that I think would want to do it, and would want to flirt with a ban for 300K.
Me: Sorry if that's affected your opinion of me, but I'll have to choose your low regard over exploiting, thanks.
Fun Times.
I was working on armor orders one day and talking to guildies in my shop, then out of the blue, with no introduction, tells ensued :
C : "where r u ?"
Me : "who is asking ?"
C: "lol. Its me <samenick as sending the tells>"
C: "I want custom **edit**"
I'll spare you the rest, but it went thru stages of him asking me to come to Lok to make armor for him specifically using his Krayt segs, conclusions that he could make me a billionaire, and finally asking for 20 suits he obviously intended to sell at a huge markup in his Lokian city. And keep the profit.
No deal.
yeah its sad what manners people have in the game they /tell you out of nowhere like they know and from reading yall's experiences its ridiculous. i just started my tailor shop and i hope not to meet people like that, but i do travel to my shop in a heartbeat to do some custom outfits, one thing i cant stand is how people /tell dumb questions and frustrate you and not even respond after you answer back
ohi finally gotto meet a stupid customer. i have been waiting for this day so i can contribute too 
XX: hello
Me: can i help you?
XX: hey can i have a holo?
Me: i'm afraid not (note:i have traded christmas holos cross-servers and made a path of holos in my shop)
XX: y not?
Me: I'm not even selling them
(after a long pause)
XX: do u even have anything for sale
XX: hello
Me: yes check my vendors
XX: there is nuthin
Me: nope
Me: just restocked
XX: u have nuthin
(another long pause)
XX: u just have the same thing
Me: same thing?
XX: yea
XX: u dont have furniture houses
Me: why of course
Me: this is Astrid's Pharmaceuticals
Me: why will there be houses here?
(XX keeps quiet, jumps into landspeeder and drives off...)
Two tales of annoyance and stupidity. Not enough space to give an account of thetypical number of daily experiences, but you get the idea...
Edited for spelling.
While waiting for the shuttlein a major city, I recieve a private tell:
Marty Moron: Dude.
Me: ?
Marty Moron: Ya, you.
Me: What can I do for you?
Marty Moron: Are you a MasterMerchant? Cuz I looked you up on theprofession list.
Me: ...*rolls eyes*...Did you have a question?
Marty Moron: How do I get a vendor?
Me: You can either place one yourself or rent one from someone. You have to be an Artisan to place one of your own.
Marty Moron: Can I just buy one from you?
Me: I can rent one to you. It's not something that I can sell to you to own.
Marty Moron: I thought you are a merchant?
Me: I am a Merchant.
Marty Moron: Then why won't you sell me a vendor?
Me:...*sigh*...The game doesn't work that way. Read the Holocron for details on how that works.
Marty Moron: I DID read the holocron, you f***ing idiot! It tells me I need to be a Merchant. That's why I want you to sell me a vendor!!!
Me: /ignore
********************************
While doing maintenance on my vendor, a customer walks in...
Clueless: Iwant a refund for thisswoop I bought from you.
Me: Why do you want a refund?
Clueless: Cuz it caught on fire. I can't use it anymore.
Me: Did you do any repairs on it?
Clueless: No. Can you fix it?
Me: I can't do that, but you can take it to a garage and have it repaired.
Clueless: I did that, but it was too expensive. It would cost more to fix it than what I bought it for.
Me: Maybe you waited too long before repairing it?
Clueless: I want a refund.
Me: Sorry, no refunds.
Clueless: *insert endless stream of cursing, followed by 3 emails telling me what a bad businessman I am.*
Me: /ignore
I am constantly amazed by the number rude, stupid people I encounter in this game. Everyday, I am forced to to deal with idiots who want everything for free, want it NOW, and think that I am a walking encyclopedia that will explain the basic game dynamics to them....which they then chose to ignore. And can someone please help me understand why 99% of the people in this game CAN'T SPELL?
Customer: i have a jedi can you make me a custome
Me:sure, what did you have in mind?
Customer: can u make me a hooded cloak
Me: sorry, tailors can't make those
Customer: I saw a Jedi with one
Me: That was an NPC.Tailors can't make one.I could make you a decorative vest, how is that?
Customer: ok black please how much $$$$?
Me: That'll be 5K
Customer: no way, that's a ripoff for something that will just decay