Entertainer Archive
Thread: just curious does gender matter to you..ex male in RL roleplaying a female entertainer?
NJ62 wrote:
The only time I object is when it's someone I know very well- either from videogames or RL - gender bending. When my fiance was toying with the idea of making a female character, I put my foot down. We play the game together a lot, and it would be absolutely weird to see him running around with a bustier on, when IRL... you get the idea. Playing "girlfriends" with the guy from across the country is one thing, but hell no I'm not dressing up my fiance. My fiance's male friend plays a girl, and it's just creepy (especially since he's trying to "marry" my fiance, dirty emotes and all!!!). But all-in-all if it's someone I don't know IRL I have no real trouble playing along.
Funny. Over in the Roleplayer forum we've already had this discussion...At length acutally. I'd prefer to know the person behind the character at least in an off-line way before I felt safe really RPing a relationship of any type. Especially if the RPer in question was another guy, which I don't have a real problem with personally. I just want to make sure that both of us knows what's in charcter stays in character...
...
My wife wouldn't have it any other way...
I don't have a problem with gender bending in a game. A problem that does come up though, is the building of real life friendships (not romances but friendships). A male friend of mine ran into sad circumstances when role playing a female character because the people he befriended ingame weren't prepared for him to be a guy in real life. He just wanted to role play but then he got emotionally attached (again, not romantically) to the friends he'd made. By the time herealized that, it was really too late to "confess" sohe deleted that character and started over..as a male.
If you never intend to bring the people you meet into your real life (whether through get togethers or just email), then it really doesn't matter.I've met numerous people online though and consider them some of my best friends. One of the best times I've had with online friends was a trip to the Renn Faire then a get together at my house. Because a few had driven a long way to attend, they stayed the night. One friend I made some 4 or 5 years ago through an online game and he sends me flowers on my birthday, we call each other from time to time, and hope to meet for a real life hug some time.
Be careful if you decide to play something you're not, whether it be a different gender or a persona you cannot ever live up to in real life (race, wealth, education, etc.) Play your role to the hilt in spatial but be honest when people are addressing the real you. Our characters are just pixels but the people behind them (and their feelings) are real. Some of us will play this game till the last server is shut down. Finding out that someone is not who you thought they were for the last several months or years can be painful. Hiding behind your character can cause real hurt feelings down the line and missed opportunities for lasting friendships.
I interact with characters, not players. I could not care less if that character is controlled by a male, female or a trained dog. I can't really verify anyway who the person behind the character is, even if I tried to, so I don't bother.
Unless you can meet the person face to face anyone can pretend to be someone on the internet. I personally know about a case a middle-aged male posed as a teenager to meet underage girls online (to later date them), pics and all.
I don't trust anything I am told on the net by another person, not without proof. Half the people onsome fantasyboards are fencers and martial artists, or ex-soldiers, or soit seems sometimes, judging from their "expert" posts on different subjects.
If you just believe what people tell you about themselves on the net, then get help. You will end up scammed, or even hurt someday if you are that trusting - and I am talking real life here, not losing some item in SWG or getting incapped and mindpoisoned, just to be clear.
If you have a problem with people gender bending because you only want to flirt with "real men/women", then get some help as well, or don't ever flirt at all- you may be too emotionally unstable and vulnerable for online RPGs, let alone chat rooms.
I always play something other than a Human Male in all games I play. I have another character who is a Bothan Male. I am a Human Male in RL, why would I want to play one in a Fantasy Game?
I think it's funny that some guys freak and squirm when I say I have Female characters in a Game. Whatever.
on his grave