I try to preserve my good humorand professional decorum at all times, but as me patience is often tested, allow me to use this forum (and a jury of my peers) to express the following:
Questions you don't NEVER want to ask your weaponsmith (feel free to add your own)
1. Do you make guns?
No, actually I have spent the last 3 months attempting to learn the intricate stitches of CROCHET, the big banner over my head that says "Master Weaponsmith" is so I can score with them loose Twi'lek bar sluts at the Cantina.... damn, you found me out - but can I interest you in a krayt turtleneck sweater?
2. Do you make [insert standard gun name here] ?
No, those are beyond my skills completely - in fact, I make every gun BUT that one, and again you have found me out, exposed the single weakness in my skillset, anf I must now perform ritual Seppuku and disembowel myself with a rusty stone knife, would you like me to hold off so you can sell tickets?
3. I don't see a [insert standard gun name here] on your vendor, do you make them?
Damn, I hope he doesn't tell his friends on me - I will be the laughingstock of the Galaxy if the word spreads.... one moment, after I answer the 4 guys attempting to talk to me at once, I will point out that the fuggin gun is on page TWO of the vendor, and the real meaning of the [NEXT 100 ITEMS] button is to call the waiter over so he can refill your tasty beverage.
4. I need a [insert standard gun name here] but I want you to make it with the Good Stuff
Crap, he wants me to make it with the "good stuff" - and here I was hoping that he would buy the limpdix version of the gun that I make with all the crappy stuff. In fact, this canny consumer realizes what most do not - that only by ASKING for the sweet materials will I pull the rabbit out of the hat and produce the gun with 60 extra damage, 3.0 secs faster, and HALF the price of my normal inventory. Friend, the "Good Stuff" is something you smoke, here - let me roll you one....
5. I need an UBER [insert standard gunname here] can you make one?
Double Dawg Damn...this fellow has noticed that NONE of my gun say "UBER" in their name, and likely wants the "Good Stuff" to be used to craft one. But since he has used the "U" word, I know that he is 12 years old or less, and therefore is using his Momma's VISA card, so this fellow I can simply ignore (I better check to see if Mommy is with him first...she may be either A) fine, or B) red agro)
6. Customer: I need a Master Weaponsmith to repair my gun (spammed at a local starport) I need a Mas...
Wepsmith: I am a master weaponsmith, what do you need repaired?
Customer: My laser rifle, WAIT - how do I know you will give it back?
Oh Drat, I almost had him .... I was about to add another 22-260 11.0s speed-sliced laser rifle with 12 condition to my vendor for resale! But, I was foiled again ....this fellow is much too smart for me, perhaps I should just slink away in shame - Screw Ralph Nader and his Consumer Awareness teachings....
Hey Numbnutz, the quick answer is "You DOn't" - and the fact that I have unlimited laser rifles of twice the damage, and half the speed.....that has never occurred to you?
Ah, I feel better already friends, thanks for listening...
Message Edited by coughhakka on 09-28-2004 10:54 PM
Echal
Weaponcrafter, Pure Pork Weapons
Naboo - Keren
Weaponcrafter, Pure Orc Weapons
Nar'Zhul PvP Server
Sepulchre
