Smuggler Archive
Thread: If they had a respec in the movies...
Page 1 of 5
Mackle
Wed Apr 27, 2005 6:07 pm
#1
INTERIOR: DEATH STAR -- INTERIOR ELEVATOR -- DETENTION SECURITY AREA.
Luke and Han step forward to exit the elevator, but the door
slides open behind them. The giant Wookiee and his two guards
enter the old grey security station. Guards and laser gates
are everywhere. Han whispers to Luke under his breath.
HAN: This is not going to work, Chewie gave up TKA. He respec'ed as a Creature Handler.
LUKE: Why didn't you say so before? Creature Handlers are useless!
HAN: I did say so before! And don't blame me that he nerfed himself, I used to be a Smuggler remember? I'm the King of Nerfs! I warned him!
LUKE: Wait... you're not a Smuggler anymore? What the hell are you now?
HAN: A freakin' Bounty Hunter. LOL! Just wait until Boba finds out, he is going to sh*t his pants ROFL!!!
LUKE: LOL OMFG!!
INTERIOR: DETENTION AREA.
Elevator doors open. A tall, grim looking Officer approaches
the trio, flashing his rank purchased from his newly-bought Faction Points.
OFFICER: Where are you taking this...thing?
Chewie growls a bit at the remark and reaches for a Shaupaut in his backpack, but Han nudges him to shut up.
LUKE: Prisoner transfer from Block one-one-three-eight.
OFFICER: I wasn't notified. I'll have to clear it.
The officer goes back to his console and pretends to punch in
the information. Han, Chewie, and Luke laugh at him, knowing none
of the consoles in the game do anything.There are only three other troopers in the
area. Luke and Han survey the situation, checking all of the
alarms, laser gates, and camera eyes. Han tries to unfasten one of
Chewbacca's electronic cuffs, remembers he gave up slicing, and shrugs to Luke.
Luke steps over and slices Chewie's cuffs. Han looks at Luke and raises an eyebrow.
LUKE: I picked up some Smuggler before the feign death nerf.
HAN: I knew it. You're one of those damned Jedi who got me nerfed, you sons of b**ches.
Suddenly Chewbacca throws up his hands and lets out with
one of his ear-piercing howls. He grabs Han's laser rifle.
HAN: Look out! He's loose!
LUKE: He's going to pull us all apart.
HAN: Go get him!
The startled guards are momentarily dumbfounded. Luke and
Han have already pulled out their laser pistols and are
blasting away at the terrifying Wookiee. Their barrage of
laserfire misses Chewbacca, but hits the camera eyes, laser
gate controls, and the Imperial guards. The officer is the
last of the guards to fall under the laserfire just as he is
about to push the alarm system. Han rushes to the comlink
system, which is screeching questions about what is going on.
He quickly checks the computer readout.
HAN: Nice! I see you respecced to Pistoleer too! We've got to find out
which cell this princess of yours is in.Here it is...cell twenty-one-eight-seven. You go get her. I'll hold
them here.
Luke races down one of the cell corridors. Han speaks into the
buzzing comlink.
HAN: (sounding official) Everything is under control. Situation
normal.
INTERCOM VOICE: What happened?
HAN: (getting nervous) Uh...had a slight weapons malfunction. Treid to
use a weapon I no longer have the certs for. But, uh,
everything's perfectly all right now. We're fine. We're all fine here,
now, thank you. How are you?
INTERCOM VOICE: We're sending a squad up.
HAN: Uh, uh, negative. We had a reactor leak here now. Give us a few
minutes to lock it down. Large leak...very dangerous.
INTERCOM VOICE: Who is this? What's your operating number?
Han blasts the comlink and it explodes. Then he puts the intercom operator on ignore.
HAN: Boring conversation anyway. (yelling down the hall) Luke! We're
going to have company!
LUKE: Hurry! Let's go... wait.. WTH is Chewie doing now?
HAN: I, uh, ummm... might be mistaken, but I, uh... think he is making a large couch.
LUKE: Son of a...
*Luke feigns death*
Luke and Han step forward to exit the elevator, but the door
slides open behind them. The giant Wookiee and his two guards
enter the old grey security station. Guards and laser gates
are everywhere. Han whispers to Luke under his breath.
HAN: This is not going to work, Chewie gave up TKA. He respec'ed as a Creature Handler.
LUKE: Why didn't you say so before? Creature Handlers are useless!
HAN: I did say so before! And don't blame me that he nerfed himself, I used to be a Smuggler remember? I'm the King of Nerfs! I warned him!
LUKE: Wait... you're not a Smuggler anymore? What the hell are you now?
HAN: A freakin' Bounty Hunter. LOL! Just wait until Boba finds out, he is going to sh*t his pants ROFL!!!
LUKE: LOL OMFG!!
INTERIOR: DETENTION AREA.
Elevator doors open. A tall, grim looking Officer approaches
the trio, flashing his rank purchased from his newly-bought Faction Points.
OFFICER: Where are you taking this...thing?
Chewie growls a bit at the remark and reaches for a Shaupaut in his backpack, but Han nudges him to shut up.
LUKE: Prisoner transfer from Block one-one-three-eight.
OFFICER: I wasn't notified. I'll have to clear it.
The officer goes back to his console and pretends to punch in
the information. Han, Chewie, and Luke laugh at him, knowing none
of the consoles in the game do anything.There are only three other troopers in the
area. Luke and Han survey the situation, checking all of the
alarms, laser gates, and camera eyes. Han tries to unfasten one of
Chewbacca's electronic cuffs, remembers he gave up slicing, and shrugs to Luke.
Luke steps over and slices Chewie's cuffs. Han looks at Luke and raises an eyebrow.
LUKE: I picked up some Smuggler before the feign death nerf.
HAN: I knew it. You're one of those damned Jedi who got me nerfed, you sons of b**ches.
Suddenly Chewbacca throws up his hands and lets out with
one of his ear-piercing howls. He grabs Han's laser rifle.
HAN: Look out! He's loose!
LUKE: He's going to pull us all apart.
HAN: Go get him!
The startled guards are momentarily dumbfounded. Luke and
Han have already pulled out their laser pistols and are
blasting away at the terrifying Wookiee. Their barrage of
laserfire misses Chewbacca, but hits the camera eyes, laser
gate controls, and the Imperial guards. The officer is the
last of the guards to fall under the laserfire just as he is
about to push the alarm system. Han rushes to the comlink
system, which is screeching questions about what is going on.
He quickly checks the computer readout.
HAN: Nice! I see you respecced to Pistoleer too! We've got to find out
which cell this princess of yours is in.Here it is...cell twenty-one-eight-seven. You go get her. I'll hold
them here.
Luke races down one of the cell corridors. Han speaks into the
buzzing comlink.
HAN: (sounding official) Everything is under control. Situation
normal.
INTERCOM VOICE: What happened?
HAN: (getting nervous) Uh...had a slight weapons malfunction. Treid to
use a weapon I no longer have the certs for. But, uh,
everything's perfectly all right now. We're fine. We're all fine here,
now, thank you. How are you?
INTERCOM VOICE: We're sending a squad up.
HAN: Uh, uh, negative. We had a reactor leak here now. Give us a few
minutes to lock it down. Large leak...very dangerous.
INTERCOM VOICE: Who is this? What's your operating number?
Han blasts the comlink and it explodes. Then he puts the intercom operator on ignore.
HAN: Boring conversation anyway. (yelling down the hall) Luke! We're
going to have company!
LUKE: Hurry! Let's go... wait.. WTH is Chewie doing now?
HAN: I, uh, ummm... might be mistaken, but I, uh... think he is making a large couch.
LUKE: Son of a...
*Luke feigns death*
Voodoohoodoo
Thu Apr 28, 2005 1:05 am
#2
has to be the funniest thing i have read on forums in about ummm......forever
ALeoNN
Thu Apr 28, 2005 9:08 am
#4
Voodoohoodoo wrote:
has to be the funniest thing i have read on forums in about ummm......forever
agreed
Meoceu
Thu Apr 28, 2005 11:54 am
#6
LMAO...now everyone in the computer lab is staring at me cause I almost fell out of my chair laughing. Great post!!!
Mott_Kruger
Thu Apr 28, 2005 11:58 am
#7
Mackle wrote:
LUKE: Hurry! Let's go... wait.. WTH is Chewie doing now?
HAN: I, uh, ummm... might be mistaken, but I, uh... think he is making a large couch.
LUKE: Son of a...
*Luke feigns death*
*****
/omg;/lmao;/grabswindexandpapertowelandcleanscokeoffofmonitor
Mujadaddy
Thu Apr 28, 2005 12:24 pm
#12
HAN: I knew it. You're one of those damned Jedi who got me nerfed, you sons of b**ches.
omf6bbqroflc0ps
Page 1 of 5