Smuggler Archive

1. your homepage is the "a chuckle for the smuggler" thread (if it's fueled by morons...it will run forever!)


2. this is your fifth time being to the smuggler forum today.....and you're at work


3. you dressed up as han solo for halloween (actually did this when i was 7)


4. you tried grinding up some meat and metal to make some gray gabaki


5. you knew you needed those materials for that spice by heart


6. you know the rest of the materials you need for every other spice in the game


7. since you hit smuggler (or have been working up the pre reqs) you were tempted to go punch some guy or buy a pistol to shoot some guy)


8. you catch yourself using quotes that Han uses in the movies (hey it's me )


9. you catch someone else using quotes that han uses in the movies


10. you know that duringa muon downer you have just enough time to take a quick shower


11. you already know where you're gonna hide the "good stuff" in you ship when JTL ships


12. you've taken your pic with the NPC han in game saying a quote (you know you all have )


13. you've spent so much time in jabba's palace RPing a smuggler for him SOE should give you your own part in his themepark


14. you tried to slice your paintball gun (btw i would not reccomend this...still havent gotten over the c02 burn)


15. when you tried the last one you couldnt pull those lazer knives from the crate


16. someone has asked you to "fix" something in game


17. you know the response you get from NPC's when purchasing faction from them by heart


18. you've changed your faction several times thanks to your....connections


19. the main reason you checked the forums today was to see if we're getting ANY love in the next patch


20. your AIM name or screen name or password is something like "smuggler" or "rouge"


21. for the last time NO i am NOT a fencer


22. you pretend during your morning commute you're carrying "contraband" to your next buyer


23. you end about 90% of your conversations in "by the way....this meeting....never happened"


24. you bought the special edition of swg because your toon woulda looked HOT with some shades


25. you attempt toFD right before that big presentation


26. it works


27. they get pissed because the bounty hunter have no "counter" to it


28. you bought this game at launch to be a smuggler


29. you still are one


30. you're tempted to ask caylin out on a date because she's one of the "cool" chicks (you knew it was comin caylin)


31. last year you asked santa for a smuggler revamp


32. this year you'll ask santa for a smuggler revamp


33. you still have that "i owe you" from SOE you got last christmas in your stocking


34. you know the infamous "im sorry i hit you again honey" marrage parody that is involved w/ smugglers


35. /secret smuggler handshake


36. you tried picking locks after you got novice smuggler


37. you accidently locked yourself out of the room with the computer in it...so you broke the door down to do some faction sales


38. you scan the scenes of the bar in ep 4, jabbas palace and the bar from ep 2 over and over to see a guy carrying some of your....products


39. you walk around bestine and walk right infront of stormies just to have the excitement of being scanned for stuff, hey you might even get to have your own classic gunfight out of a city


40. you tell newbies that they should let you smuggle some stuff around the city because your bored and it increases immersion for them


41. they get pissed and call you an a-hole and say you'll steal it


42. you put that story up on the "chuckle for a smuggler" thread


43. a few other people have the same story


44. your "dream computer" has a little bit of text above it saying "smuggler mission terminal"


45. you can actually have fun RPing a "peddler" in anchorhead selling some of your "products"


46. you have your own trademark saying that is "smugglery"


47. you're a human smuggler, either your alt or best in game buddy is a wookie with a bow caster


48. "she made the kessel run in less than twelve parsecs" will definatley be in your pro regarding your ship


49. you hear about some guy holding his breath till the smuggler revamp...and realize your turing slightly purple...


50. you frequently have debates on how "muon" is pronounced (my friend think's it's pronounced Mon)


51. you STILL go peddle some stuff to jawas


52. you've dropped and remastered smuggler in less than a day just to prove you could


53. even though you can easily get the codes for the geo caves you still go there JUST to slice the terminals


54. in battlefront you ALWAYS play the wookie smuggler


55. you mean LUKE was the main character? really? are you SURE?


56. by now you've dealt with so many morons regarding slicing that you have a macro of "/reply here's how slicing works.....


57. you use it more than low blow


58. you opened up your computer and said "the red wire or the blue wire?"


59. after that little incident you almost went insane when your internet died


60. you were even more mad because you didnt get the speed slice you wanted


61. you told lucas arts and bio ware they should make a game "smugglers of the old republic"


62. you made a grave outside your house with the words "here lies the smuggler revamp" written on it


63. you seriously thought about naming you child Han


64. you constantly debate with friends if Han shot first


65. for the record Han DID shoot first


66. the previous arguement always get changed into if he was grinding tka for a tripple master when he knocked over that scout trooper in ROTJ


67. your happy they didnt release that video of you during your alone time...or else there would be "starwars kid" and there would be "smuggler kid"


68. blasters over lightsabers any day


69. your in so much law trouble that when JTL ships your ship's gonna be grounded by authoroties for a few weeks anyway


70. you keep TRYING to reason with the bloodrazors on lok but they always end up with a blaster bolt where the sun dont shine


71. if your template was ever missing "master smuggler" from it you'd rather feign die with out the feign


72. you're taking a break about here because you wanna see if your downer's over from the neutron


73. you cant WAIT for the glitterstim schematic


74. you're gonna boycot glitterstim because it helps a certain "group" that ruined your gaming experience


75. the first thing that's gonna come outta your mouth when your flying around is "she dosent look like much but she's got it where it counts kid"


76. the second will be "hear me baby? hold together!"


77. you think the reason you got into beta was cause of your underworld skills


78. in rouge leader the falcon was ALWAYS your fav ship


79. you always wonder why han was happy for getting 15k outta luke and obi wan


80. you realize it was because the revamp finally happened and that was how they implemented smuggler missions


81. you re-inact the scene with han and greedo in mos eisley with a rodian friend


82. you made sure you shoot first


83. you play games of "smugglers luck" with friends instead of guild raids


84. you OWN people in pazzak


85. you also own em in sabbac


86. the best part of theed is that little building near the med center where you can gamblelike 5 credits in slot machines


87. unfortunatley doing # 85 will get you more money than spice


88. whenever you puke you always respond with "downer"


89. your unfinished math homework is "contraband" and your teacher is "authorities"


90. you so desperatley hope that you can put those floor boards in your YT


91. you always break up with a girfriend with "afraid i was gonna leave without a goodbye kiss?"


92. the reason you broke up is because you cant stand not loggin in as your smuggler toon


93. you really dont care because you're still a master smuggler


94. smuggler revamp > cancun during july


95. your boss found you reading this at work and your now fired, but dont care because these are funny as hell


96. if SOE were to implement spice experimentation today....you wouldnt leave your comp for a year


97. by the time you left your computer the revamp STILL woudnt be here


98. THIS SPACE DEDICATED to all members of PACK, the all bothan guild on ahazi (always lookin for new bothans to join up)


99. this spot goes to whoever gets FIRST!


100. THIS SPOT DEDICATED TO SMUGGLER_CAYLIN!!!!!!!!

FOR THE RECORD!!!!

Yes i do have a life, a band and decent grades in school, i made this because i was sick and was pretty bored

AND REGARDING #83

"smugglers luck" is a game i made up which i'll post later on how to play, YOU'LL LIKE IT!!!

SMUGGLERS LUCK!!!

a smuggler here told me once "your game time is what you make of it"

this is how to play smugglers luck!

first off, this is a MULTIPLAYER game, you will need multiple smugglers (3 or more) you will also need to be rebel AND they all have to be masters (or all at equal level, you decide)

OBJECTIVE: to the be the last smuggler standing

all smuggler go to bestine (or any other stormie inflated town, korvella is best for low profile games) UNBUFFED, you all start at one place, maybe inside the cloningcenter? starport, ect, but a "home".

set a timer for 10 mins (i believe an in game one exists but forgot the /command)

youmay all pop 1 spice of your choice (NO FOOD). now (using only pisols and no looted ones cept geo blasters) you start kill as many stormies as you can using marksman and smuggler moves ONLY (in certain games i'll allow /pistolmeleedefence because it is a tad smugglerey). the point here is to rack up as many dead stormies as you can (individually).

at teh end of 10 mins head to the "home" base and tell how many kills you got, people w/ 2 lowest kill #s have to duel regardless of downer, the one that gets incapped is "out" and may sit around

so if you chose a weak spice you might get less stormie kills but will be better prepared for your duel

or you can go w/ neutron and gamble for highest kills and pray for no duel

you can also pop a spice during a battle against stormies instead of at the beginning

NO feign during duels (okay against stormies)

NO tka meditate

YOU CAN wear armour, BUT dont show up to a full game with your comp you wore from your last buff, you can equip what you want after your spice

NO kill stealing

NO FOOD

it's still in a "beta" but try it with some smuggler buddies, alter the rules if you like if some of you arent MP/smg or w/ever

Message Edited by Jakkal_Darkwind on 10-13-2004 07:20 PM

Message Edited by 01201986 on 04-10-2005 09:56 PM