Smuggler Archive
Thread: Monty Python and the Broken Game (Got a little bored yesterday)
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Mopdalton
Tue Jul 12, 2005 4:32 am
#1
Scene 1:
DEV #1: Yo! Who goes there?
Player: It is I, Funny Pants, member of LEET from the Player City of Dantooine Hunters. Deafeater of Jedi, Leet guy of all Imperials
D1: Whose the other thing?
P: This is my guildmate MacN' Chees'e, We have shuttle across Corellia in search of Dev's who will aid us in the fixing of a broken game. May I speak with your Boss?
D1: What!? Came by a shuttle?
P: Yes!
D1: Your useing a shortbus!
P: What?
D1: Youve got a bright blue shortbus and you rid it across corellia
P: So! We have ridden since groups of 3 At-ST's roamed this land, through the perils of...
D1: Where did you get the shorbus?
P: We made it!
D1: Made it? With an Artisan? But your a BH!
P: What do you mean?
D1: Well you only have 250 skill points and you cant be very effective at only level 54!
P: The player may purchase a second account, or group with a level 80, even attack a afk Jedi, yet these are not strangers to our land!
D1: Are you suggesting BH's are lamers?
P: No not at all, Im just saying they could use other methods.
D1: A BH Mastering Artisan?
P: He could afk grind all day!
D1: Its not a matter of how he grinds it...its a simple matter of skill points. a Master artisan BH cant hunt Jedi effectivly, its just not possible.
P: Well it doesnt matter, Go tell your boss we are looking for devs for our broken game!
D1: Listen! In order to maintain level 80 a BH must pick up a second combat skill right?
P: Please!
D1: Am I right?
P: Im not interested!
Developer 2: The BH could have repeced!
D1: Oh yeah a respec BH but not a normal one.
D2: I Agree with that...
D1: But then again Respec BH's are all level 80
D2: oh, yeah
D1: so they couldnt be master artisan anyways
[End scene]
Scene 2:
[Two Jedi Duke it out with a Dark Jedi winning]
P: You fight with strength of many brawlers sir Knight
[pause]
I am Funny Pants of the guild LEET
[pause]
I seek the uberest and leetest Knights to join my guild
[pause]
You seem pretty leet, do you wanna join?
[pause]
You make me cry [/cry] You suck! Come on Mac'N
DJK: Go Away!
P: What?
DJK: Go Away!
P: I am uber leet and I dont want to own you but I must use this shuttle
[City ban player]
P: N00b!
[Player head shots the DJK, but he blocks it]
P: Now unban me loser!
DJK: I blocked it...
P: YOu blocked it! But you...oh
DJK: Saber block FTW!
P: Saber Block is for newbs!
DJK: Come on you krettlehead!
[Super sound effects here]
P: I own you!
DJK: Ha! Come on then!
P: What?
DJK: Have at you! [power attack]
P: Your are indeed good sir knight but I win.
DJK: Oh been owned enough eh?
P: Look you stupid b**tard I sniper shotted you for 3k damage!
DJK: I blocked it!
P: Look in combat!
DJK: No dont see it, I-AM-UBER!
P: Stop that or I'll report you!
DJK: Kreetlehead!
P: Look Ill incap you!
[He sniper shots the Jedi]
DJK[In tell to player]: I'll own you for that!
P: Your a newb
[Player drives off, end scene]
Scene 3:
Group of BH's: A Jedi! Nerf em!
BH1: We found aJedi will you nerf it?
Group:Nerf it!
Wise'Guy Smrts': How do you know she is a Jedi?
BH2: Her stick glows like one!
Group: Yeah!
W: Bring her here...
Jedi: Im not a Jedi, Im not a Jedi!
W: But your stick glows like one!
Jedi: They made it glow like this!
Group: Nuh uh!
Jedi: And these arent Jedi robes, they're fake ones!
W: Well?
BH: We did the robes
W: The robes?
BH2: And the stick but she is a Jedi!
W: Did you dress her up like this?
BH1: No!
BH2: No!
BH3: No!
Tailor: No!
BH1: Yes!
BH2: Yes!
BH3: Yes!
T: A bit!
BH1: A bit!
BH2: A bit!
BH3: A bit!
BH1: Shes got badges!
W: What makes you think she is a Jedi?
BH3: She turned me into a Ranger!
W: A ranger?
BH3: I dropped it...
Group:Nerf er' ne ways!
W: Shut up newbs! We can tell if shes a Jedi
Group: How?
W: Tell me, what do you do with Jedi?
BH1: Nerf em!
BH2: Nerf!
BH3: NERF!!!!1111oneone
W: and what do you nerf apart from Jedi?
BH1: More Jedi!
BH3: Shhhh!
Tailor: Smugglers!
W: So why do Jedi get Nerfed?
[pause]
BH2: Because they're smugglers?
W: Good! lol!
Group: oh yeah!
W: so how do we tell if she is a smuggler?
BH1: Buy spice off of 'er!
W: But can you not also buy spices off of vendors?
Group: oh yeah!
W: Tell me; do smugglers get love?
BH3: No no!
BH2: No they get ignored!
Group: Ignore her!
W: what also gets ignored?
BH1: Rangers!
BH3: Droid Engineers!
BH2: Little tiny bothans!
Tailor: Tailors!
BH1: Battlefields
BH3: Carbineers!
DEV #1: Yo! Who goes there?
Player: It is I, Funny Pants, member of LEET from the Player City of Dantooine Hunters. Deafeater of Jedi, Leet guy of all Imperials
D1: Whose the other thing?
P: This is my guildmate MacN' Chees'e, We have shuttle across Corellia in search of Dev's who will aid us in the fixing of a broken game. May I speak with your Boss?
D1: What!? Came by a shuttle?
P: Yes!
D1: Your useing a shortbus!
P: What?
D1: Youve got a bright blue shortbus and you rid it across corellia
P: So! We have ridden since groups of 3 At-ST's roamed this land, through the perils of...
D1: Where did you get the shorbus?
P: We made it!
D1: Made it? With an Artisan? But your a BH!
P: What do you mean?
D1: Well you only have 250 skill points and you cant be very effective at only level 54!
P: The player may purchase a second account, or group with a level 80, even attack a afk Jedi, yet these are not strangers to our land!
D1: Are you suggesting BH's are lamers?
P: No not at all, Im just saying they could use other methods.
D1: A BH Mastering Artisan?
P: He could afk grind all day!
D1: Its not a matter of how he grinds it...its a simple matter of skill points. a Master artisan BH cant hunt Jedi effectivly, its just not possible.
P: Well it doesnt matter, Go tell your boss we are looking for devs for our broken game!
D1: Listen! In order to maintain level 80 a BH must pick up a second combat skill right?
P: Please!
D1: Am I right?
P: Im not interested!
Developer 2: The BH could have repeced!
D1: Oh yeah a respec BH but not a normal one.
D2: I Agree with that...
D1: But then again Respec BH's are all level 80
D2: oh, yeah
D1: so they couldnt be master artisan anyways
[End scene]
Scene 2:
[Two Jedi Duke it out with a Dark Jedi winning]
P: You fight with strength of many brawlers sir Knight
[pause]
I am Funny Pants of the guild LEET
[pause]
I seek the uberest and leetest Knights to join my guild
[pause]
You seem pretty leet, do you wanna join?
[pause]
You make me cry [/cry] You suck! Come on Mac'N
DJK: Go Away!
P: What?
DJK: Go Away!
P: I am uber leet and I dont want to own you but I must use this shuttle
[City ban player]
P: N00b!
[Player head shots the DJK, but he blocks it]
P: Now unban me loser!
DJK: I blocked it...
P: YOu blocked it! But you...oh
DJK: Saber block FTW!
P: Saber Block is for newbs!
DJK: Come on you krettlehead!
[Super sound effects here]
P: I own you!
DJK: Ha! Come on then!
P: What?
DJK: Have at you! [power attack]
P: Your are indeed good sir knight but I win.
DJK: Oh been owned enough eh?
P: Look you stupid b**tard I sniper shotted you for 3k damage!
DJK: I blocked it!
P: Look in combat!
DJK: No dont see it, I-AM-UBER!
P: Stop that or I'll report you!
DJK: Kreetlehead!
P: Look Ill incap you!
[He sniper shots the Jedi]
DJK[In tell to player]: I'll own you for that!
P: Your a newb
[Player drives off, end scene]
Scene 3:
Group of BH's: A Jedi! Nerf em!
BH1: We found aJedi will you nerf it?
Group:Nerf it!
Wise'Guy Smrts': How do you know she is a Jedi?
BH2: Her stick glows like one!
Group: Yeah!
W: Bring her here...
Jedi: Im not a Jedi, Im not a Jedi!
W: But your stick glows like one!
Jedi: They made it glow like this!
Group: Nuh uh!
Jedi: And these arent Jedi robes, they're fake ones!
W: Well?
BH: We did the robes
W: The robes?
BH2: And the stick but she is a Jedi!
W: Did you dress her up like this?
BH1: No!
BH2: No!
BH3: No!
Tailor: No!
BH1: Yes!
BH2: Yes!
BH3: Yes!
T: A bit!
BH1: A bit!
BH2: A bit!
BH3: A bit!
BH1: Shes got badges!
W: What makes you think she is a Jedi?
BH3: She turned me into a Ranger!
W: A ranger?
BH3: I dropped it...
Group:Nerf er' ne ways!
W: Shut up newbs! We can tell if shes a Jedi
Group: How?
W: Tell me, what do you do with Jedi?
BH1: Nerf em!
BH2: Nerf!
BH3: NERF!!!!1111oneone
W: and what do you nerf apart from Jedi?
BH1: More Jedi!
BH3: Shhhh!
Tailor: Smugglers!
W: So why do Jedi get Nerfed?
[pause]
BH2: Because they're smugglers?
W: Good! lol!
Group: oh yeah!
W: so how do we tell if she is a smuggler?
BH1: Buy spice off of 'er!
W: But can you not also buy spices off of vendors?
Group: oh yeah!
W: Tell me; do smugglers get love?
BH3: No no!
BH2: No they get ignored!
Group: Ignore her!
W: what also gets ignored?
BH1: Rangers!
BH3: Droid Engineers!
BH2: Little tiny bothans!
Tailor: Tailors!
BH1: Battlefields
BH3: Carbineers!
Tailor: Creature Handlers!
Player: A Durni!
Group: ohhhh!
W: Right! so logically?
BH1: If...she weighs...the same..as a durni,....shes a smuggler
W: And therefore is a....?
Group: A Jedi!
BH3:Nerf er!
BH2: NERF NERF!
[They weigh a durni and the Jedi on a scale thats a bit off]
Group: A Jedi
BH1: Nerf!
Group: ohhhh!
W: Right! so logically?
BH1: If...she weighs...the same..as a durni,....shes a smuggler
W: And therefore is a....?
Group: A Jedi!
BH3:Nerf er!
BH2: NERF NERF!
[They weigh a durni and the Jedi on a scale thats a bit off]
Group: A Jedi
BH1: Nerf!
BH2: Throw er in the in fountain
[Splash!]
Tailor: Nerf her!
[Scene ends with the group chasing the jedi with rifles, pistols, carbines, and clothing crafting tools]
I get bored too much....
I get bored too much....
LordAurther
Tue Jul 12, 2005 4:42 am
#2
You maybe bored but it shows a sad state of affairs when a game can so easily be turned into a Monty Python Movie.
egbertvanloenen
Tue Jul 12, 2005 5:43 am
#4
lol, i especially love the 3rd one 
SOEand the quest for the holy nerfbat!
rogue_eight
Tue Jul 12, 2005 5:47 am
#5
BH1: Shes got badges!
W: What makes you think she is a Jedi?
BH3: She turned me into a Ranger!
W: A ranger?
BH3: I dropped it...
LMFAO
Pure genius
W: What makes you think she is a Jedi?
BH3: She turned me into a Ranger!
W: A ranger?
BH3: I dropped it...
LMFAO
Pure genius
WesBelden
Tue Jul 12, 2005 7:11 am
#8
rofl, genius 
.. although please add the line to the witch/Jedi scene, "It's a fair cop"
.. although please add the line to the witch/Jedi scene, "It's a fair cop"
Chemistrius
Tue Jul 12, 2005 8:46 am
#10
Mopdalton wrote:W: what also gets ignored?
BH1: Rangers!
BH3: Droid Engineers!
BH2: Little tiny bothans!
Tailor: Tailors!
Too friggin funny, I rolled out of my seat.
Mopdalton
Tue Jul 12, 2005 9:53 pm
#11
Thanks for the compliments, Its amazing what watching the holy grail and slicing can do
Tango505
Tue Jul 26, 2005 3:38 pm
#13
That post was HILARIOUS!!
wait...it's only a model! 
A model for all aspiring dev's out there to nerf everyone back to the stone...er....medieval ages! Yes, yes that's it.
Come along Percy. Camalot's a silly place!
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