Smuggler Archive

The Peoples Popular Front for Promised RE-VAMP for Smuggler's (TPPFFPRFS).

Demands Scene

(The interior of MacGregors New thread. A thread with a very conspiratorial atmosphere. N00bSmuggler and OLDBitterSmuggler have already posted their support. JEDIsmuggler, -- black robes and a red sash around his head -- has just posted a plan on the thread.
A audience of about eight MASKED SMUGGLERS are lurking on the thread.

JEDIsmuggler
We get in through the 10megZip system here ... up through to
the main server control here ... and Tiggs PC is here.
Having hacked the PC, we inform the DEVS that it is in our custody and
forthwith issue our demands. Any questions?
Lurking MASKED SMUGGLER1
What exactly are the demands?
N00bSmuggler
We're giving the DEVS two days to dismantle the entire apparatus of theSOEOppresive State, fix all bugs, revamp us, allow us to smuggle, nerf Rangers,Entertainers, Commandosand CH and if they don't agree immediately we execute her PC hard drive.
MacGregor
Cut out bits of files?
JEDIsmuggler
Cut all her bits off, send 'em back every hour on the hour ... show them we're not to betrifled with.
N00bSmuggler
Also, we're demanding a in game ten foot holo statue of WEZBELDINIOUS for any SMUGGLERwith 7 days in the proffesion.
OLDBitterSmuggler
What? They'll never agree to that.

MacGregor

What bit?

OLDBitterSmuggler

Fixing the bugs
JEDIsmuggler
That's just a bargaining counter. And of course, we point out that theybear full responsibility when we chop her PC hard drive up, AND ... that we shall NOTsubmit to forum bans.
ALL
(Applause) No forum bans.!!!! Down with GARVINUS STEALTHVINUS NINJI BANNUM
MacGregor
They've bled us white, the #x@43*s. They've taken every bug and suggestion we posted, and never replied,not just from us, from our fathers and from our fathers' fathers.
OLDBitterSmuggler
And from our fathers' fathers' fathers.
JEDIsmuggler
Yes.
OLDBitterSmuggler
And from our fathers' fathers' fathers' fathers.
JEDIsmuggler
All right, OLDBitterSmuggler. Don't labour the point. And what have they ever given
us IN RETURN? (he pauses smugly)
Lurking MASKED SMUGGLER2
Player Cities?
MacGregor
What?
Lurking MASKED SMUGGLER2
Player Cities?.
JEDIsmuggler
Oh yeah, yeah they gave us that. Yeah. That's true.
Lurking MASKED SMUGGLER3
And the pets!
JEDIsmuggler
Oh yes ... pets, OLDBitterSmuggler, you remember what the game used to be like
without pets
MacGregor
All right, I'll grant you that the player cities and the pets are two
things that the DEVS HAVE done ...
JEDIsmuggler
And the player spacecraft ...
MacGregor
(sharply) Well YES OBVIOUSLY the player spacecraft ... the spacecraft go without saying.
But apart from the player cities,the pets,and the spacecraft ...
Lurking MASKED SMUGGLER4
Player vehicles ...
OTHER MASKED SMUGGLER VOICES
PVP ... GCW ... Corvette
MacGregor
Yes ... all right, fair enough ...
MASKED SMUGGLER NEARER THE FRONT
And the CU ...
GENERAL
Oh yes! True!
N00bSmuggler
Yeah. That's something we'd really miss if the DEVS left, JEDIsmuggler.
MASKED SMUGGLER8 AT BACK
ROTW!
N00bSmuggler
AND it's safe to die there now no wounds or BF.
MacGregor
Yes, they certainly know how to keep content flowing ...
(general nodding)
... let's face it, they're the only ones who could in a game like this.
(more general murmurs of agreement)
JEDIsmuggler
All right ... all right ... but apart from the player cities, the pets, player vehicles and the spacecraft,Corvette, PVP, GCW, the CU, ROTW and GARVINUS TERROR.
what HAVE the DEVS done for US?
N00bSmuggler
New Slicing System!
MacGregor
(very angry, he's not having a good thread at all)
What!? Oh ... (scornfully) New Slicing System, yes ... shut up!

..............................

Ferrer

Cash Faction

Ferrer Roberts, Infinity
Oh my - weve been smedley'ed

"God will roast their stomachs in hell"

See http://www.welovetheiraqiinformationminister.com/ for where SOE got its Customer Service Ethos............