Smuggler Archive

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AngusMacGregor wrote:

*Disclaimer* This is not real. This is a joke. Those without a sense of humor should run away from this thread now. Run far. Run fast. We don't want to hear about it.

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KombatCamKombat wrote:

Will you please stop spamming the boards with your posts?

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• Star Wars Galaxies is not what it used to be.


• You will not be able to cancel your account, This will prevent from players leaving.


• CSRs have been removed.

• You now have lights shows like dancers and can wear Metal Bikini Tops and Bikini Leggings even if you are Male.

Ranger

• Harvesting has been removed from the profession, go back to scout.

Bio-Engineer

• Can now make Players since we want to hog more money from you.
  
• Bio-Engineers can now craft Tissue Paper and Toilet Paper.

Dancer

• Well now be able to go around Naked since most of the dancers are males in Female Twi'lek toons.

Smuggler

• You can now craft a new spice called "Laxant" this will be the "I-Win-Button" and one of the most Dangerous spices since It has no downers and leaves a toxic Poison cloud in a 5000m radius which has 1000 dmg tics (sp).

Creature Handler

• Your max pet taming lvl has been reduced to 11, any pets you own now will be deleted but since we do not have an exact code everything in your datapad will be deleted.

• Dual Wielding is now here! Amaze your friends with fancyrifle spins and tricks!
  
• Sniper shot has been increased by 5x the dmg.
  
• Cover will now break only if the person is 1m from you.
  
• Startle shot's cooldown timer has been removed so you can now chain it at your will.

Carbineer

• Dual Wielding is now here! Amaze your friends with fancyCarbine spins and tricks!


• We have desinged a special Holster which lets you hide your Carbine up places we don't wanna know.

• Jedis will now be able to heal every second w/o interupting an Attack.
  
• Force Infusion now lats 5 hours.
  
• Force shield now has 9k resist to everything.
  
• Force speed now increases speed by 100 points.

Message Edited by Cookie-Eater on 07-11-2005 10:17 PM

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AngusMacGregor wrote:

*Disclaimer* This is not real. This is a joke. Those without a sense of humor should run away from this thread now. Run far. Run fast. We don't want to hear about it.

General Notes

• Star Wars Galaxies is now rated Adult. All players under 18 can no longer be allowed to play. We realize that this will decimate the Jedi population, but we think this is a positive change for the game.

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YuriaTayde wrote:

And you put something on the Ranger slot, that just won't do...

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okay, anyone else here watch Red vs. Blue? I totally heard Sarge saying "and that just won't do" when I read this post. Also, thanks for making me laugh my spleen out. Do you know how expensive it is to get one reattached? Well, neither do I. and I don't want to find out.

LTS spleen PST!

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Tactical_Dave wrote:

Player (to Hawt Twi'lek dancer): How about a lapdance, Baby?

Dancer: How about a tip?

Player: /tip dancer 50

Dancer: Thanks /sarcasmoff

Player: Lemme buy you a Kool-Aid, too. Har-de-har-har

Dancer: hmm, 50 creds and a Kool-aid? That will buy you a two-finger dance. Can you guess which 2 fingers that would be, noob?

LOL, you should post in the Jedi forums, Angus. There's a lot of people who take themselves too seriously there.

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Are you trying to get me killed?

Serisously, I wouldn't post anything like this on the Jedi forum without an asbestos suit, a stainless steel ass guard, earplugs, and a good blaster to shoot myself in the head for being stupid enough to post there.