Smuggler Archive
Thread: In the Year 2000...
/flashlightunderchin
...Smugglers will still have 4 branches, but only a single skill, containing our new version of a BH-friendly feign called "Grovel."
...The Smuggler correspondent will be a bot, programmed to respond to the TH-bot's "20-Questions" posts with the same 20 answers we've been repeating since release.
...The smuggler community will be desperately excited about their new Content" patch, scheduled for"Right afterthe Underwater expansion! We swear!"
..It will beentitled "Patch 273: Kickboys Pacified!"
..."Star Wars Galaxies" will be renamed "Star Wars Galaxy"when the remainingservers arecombined into Bria. Both subscribers will protest in Theed for 5 minutes, and then be teleported into the planet's core.
...Valcyn willbe online and independent, as SOE will still be unaware of its existence.
..."SWG: Platinum" will be released, which will include all of the expansions, as well as a teaser of Lucas' digitally and holographically Rererereremastered $tar War$: "Pimpin' this Franchise Ain't Easy!" Edition.
...This new version will still miss a couple of old accidents, such as theblue escape-pod door,and Jar-Jar.
...Hasbro will release a line of SWG-related action-figures, representing each class and major character from the game. Han-Solo will be available for the first time as a little-person, and the Smuggler package will be empty save for an "IOU."
...The Darth Vader and Obi-Wan figures will be available via mail-order, but only after mailingUPC symbols from 28,000 Quenker-figures.
More to come, after I get some work done. 
-Zz
Was hard to pick which was the best one but that line did it for me
Bzzzz wrote:
/flashlightunderchin
......The Darth Vader and Obi-Wan figures will be available via mail-order, but only after mailingUPC symbols from 28,000 Quenker-figures......
Bzzzz wrote:
...Smugglers will still have 4 branches, but only a single skill, containing our new version of a BH-friendly feign called "Grovel."
Bzzzz wrote:
/flashlightunderchin
Bzzzz wrote:
/flashlightunderchin
...Recursive macroing will be eliminated, along with all potentially repeatable interface actions, including (but not limited to) keyboard hotkeys. All command scripts must be typed out completely: ie. "/ui action MoveCharacterForward 1" Customer-Care will deem this a tremendous success, as the playerbase (both subscriptions) will develop carpal-tunnel and be unable to submit /bug reports.
...Dancers and musicians will revolt, and be replaced by NPCs that spit on you if you don't give them enough money.
...Bounty-Hunterswill demand that they be spit on more, as they've invested more skillpoints than anyone else, and are therefore more deserving.
-Zz
Not only will we still not be able to autopull from crates, we won't be able to make our own tools anymore, because of a new profession called the Slicingsmith.
We'll gain the ability to understand what Tusken raiders say, and be very disappointed when we find out that they're saying, "Die, smuggler pig dog!" right before they shoot us in the face.
