Smuggler Archive
Thread: I'm new, not stupid. A.k.a. Adventures in Training Smuggler
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Gaitan
Mon Apr 04, 2005 7:17 am
#1
I'm on Dantooine, taking on quenkers with my little green droid out in the hopes something will take a liking to it in the way things have taken a liking to my speederbike. (No luck so far, next stop - Dathomir.) I've managed to work my way up to 1-4-4-4 Smuggler, and I'm proudly displaying my "Slicer" title. The familiar ping of an incoming tell informs me that the games shall begin.
"canu slice my pistol?"
"I can, but you should know I'm not a master."
'that's ok.i just want it2 b faster"
Uh-oh.
"you know it's random right? We won't get to choose until the CU and the smuggler upgrade comes in. You might get a damage increase instead."
"ok. but it might b faster"
Maybe I should get out of this one now.
"maybe you should look around for a master smuggler. I know there's one around the Mining Outpost, they just trained me a little bit ago. <name> is her name. Why not send her a tell?"
A moment of regret. She really *was* nice, and offered some good tips on training. I just turfed Rain Man on her and I'm pretty sure he'll use my name.
"she no on"
Okay, one of those good news/bad news sort of things.
"okay I'm headed to the mining outpost now, why not meet me in the cantina?"
"k"
The usual meet and greet, he's got the "/" stuff down with bows and greetings and smiles. A trade request later and I'm holding a DX2.
"how much"
"Just pay me what you think it's worth."
"rmember spd plz"
I have a bad feeling about this. Slice and dice, presto change-o and...
13% Damage slice. (Nice touch with the "!" at the end there SOE.)
I break the happy news to him, and find myself rapidly taking notes on new profanities that I've not heard before. Use your imagination (and I'm betting you still won't even be close to what he said).
"i'm not paying u 4 that"
"Excuse me? I warned you I wasn't a Master, and I also told you there was a chance it wouldn't be a speed slice. A 50% chance since there are only two choices. Now I've used up a molecular clamp and 2 charges on a laser knife, and my time isn't free. I expect something, even if it's only 500 or 1000 credits."
<new round of expletives, I do believe there was a "no" in there>
*Note to self: Investigate why someone that uses "ur", 2, "m8", "ltr" and all sorts of shorthand still has the desire tospelloutthe entire profanity.*
But I digress. He calms down and refuses to pay anything for the slice. At this point I'm tempted to /tip *him* something to make him go away. He starts in again on the reasons he's not paying and the word "noob" enters the conversation. My buffs are wasting away, so I just say "Thanks for the pistol" and head out the door.
"ur keepin it?"
"yep. Thanks for the pistol. Better swear fast because by the time you finish reading this message you'll be on my ignore list. Man I *love* that part of this game don't you?"
/addignore <name>
But the night is still young. Back to savage quenkers since I'll need enough XP to train Novice Pistoleer (someone just gave me a DX2, might as well be able to use it right? 
) and I wander back into New Dublin. They have a great setup there, love the place. *ping*
) and I wander back into New Dublin. They have a great setup there, love the place. *ping*"u got brandy?"
Ctrl-1 to check my title. I know I dropped the Slicer tag, wanted to make sure I hadn't somehow substituted "Village Idiot" for it.
"Yes I do, brought a case of it"
"u got extra?"
"It's a case of 25 and it last for 46 minutes, so it should last me a while." Jeez, how much does this guy think I need anyways?
"i need some"
<email waypoint to Theed Mall>
"no i mean now u got extra i cn have?" (Can't believe I didn't see that one coming)
"Why not just run to Theed Mall and grab some?"
"take 2 long"
"Theed Mall is less than 900m from Theed starport. If you've got JtL you can be there and back in 5 minutes."
"u can't give me some extra?"
Ctrl-1 (Just making sure)
"In less time than you've spent sending me tells, you could have been there and back."
"so no?"
"If I could split one it wouldn't be a problem, but the one I have out has 18 sips left."
"i need 2 only i will give back. u have enuff"
Ctrl-1 (Can't hurt right?)
"Yes, I carry extra so I won't look like a complete idiot asking someone if *they* have extra brandy."
"why not?"
"Because there is 4 things in life I can't stand. Drunk women, stupid people, dull razors and warm beer. In just about that order too."
Silence.
/addignore <name> (Just making sure.)
Now back to more important things, like figuring out what likes to eat little green droids. A shame you can't rename them. Then again, the game would be flooded with R2-Greenie's named "Kill Me Please"
Dragon942
Mon Apr 04, 2005 7:24 am
#2
rofl
Good post. Lucky me I've never run into those idiots that just don't get the random slice thing. Certianly people that didn't know, but not that couldn't learn.
Pie-Oh-Pah
Mon Apr 04, 2005 7:28 am
#3
Still laughing tears - especially since I am just having a string of similar people too...
On the other hand I have had a lot of people too who know about the randomness of slicing and who tip nicely if it comes close to what they wanted...
*nudges*
Hey, if you find out how to get rid of that wee green pest - lemme know...
On the other hand I have had a lot of people too who know about the randomness of slicing and who tip nicely if it comes close to what they wanted...
*nudges*
Hey, if you find out how to get rid of that wee green pest - lemme know...
testify4
Mon Apr 04, 2005 7:52 am
#4
Heh heh...Well played. I think I have had my Master Smuggler or Slicer tag up for a grand total of 5 minutes this year. I hope this changes with the revamp, because having to make sure the client understands the ins and outs of slicing before I begin really adds up over time. I don't slice unless they know the risks, and wind up explaining the whole process often enough that it's macroed.
Rule number 1: If you get a tell with l33t speek or AIM English, back away slowly and set your tag to "Novice Marksman".
Rule number 1: If you get a tell with l33t speek or AIM English, back away slowly and set your tag to "Novice Marksman".
Gaitan
Mon Apr 04, 2005 8:03 am
#5
testify4 wrote:
Rule number 1: If you get a tell with l33t speek or AIM English, back away slowly and set your tag to "Novice Marksman".
Yeah, and where were you yesterday friend? Could have used that knowledge. Then again, experience is something you don't have until you don't need it anymore right?
Sengis
Mon Apr 04, 2005 8:06 am
#6
lol a chuckle in deed, but the brandy, cmonn man, I splash the booze on evryone, gets me customer loyalty!
dlc3007
Mon Apr 04, 2005 8:12 am
#7
Bet you can't wait to make Master.
btw - I have my Master Smuggler tag on all the time if I don't have plans (guild hunt, etc). 98% of the people are polite, friendly, etc. It seems you've already figured out what to do with the other 2%.
Ecnirp
Mon Apr 04, 2005 8:20 am
#8
Yeah I very rarely keep my master smuggler title up...... or if I do I make sure I am not searchable so I don't get tells from everyone within range asking if I can slice there complete set of armour for 1k or something like that.
I did have one funny one... a guy I bought something off asked if I could slice a Krayt Jawa Rifle for him, sure no problem I thought.
He then asked if I could also takea crate of CDEF pistols from him and keep slicing them first till I got 5 Speed slices on the trot... then slice the Rifle,I reminded him that it is random and I didn't think it would make any difference... he said he would like me to try anyway and would pay me 100k for my trouble.
Well I think it was about 23 CDEFs before I got the 5 speed slices on the trot... sliced the Jawa.... 21% speed He was very good though and I got my 100k (although I guess I could have earned more from just doing 23 slices at my normal rate!)
He was very good though and I got my 100k (although I guess I could have earned more from just doing 23 slices at my normal rate!)Few weeks later he got in touch again and asked if I could slice some Acklay PH for him... once again he handed over acrate of CDEF pistols and said this time he wanted me to wait till I got 3 speeds on the trot then slice all the PH together.
He was a bit happier with the result this time... from 9 PH I got 28%,30%, 31%, 33% and 35% Damage slices!! My first "professional" 35% Damage slice.
Message Edited by Ecnirp on 04-04-2005 05:21 PM
Gaitan
Mon Apr 04, 2005 8:35 am
#10
Sengis wrote:
lol a chuckle in deed, but the brandy, cmonn man, I splash the booze on evryone, gets me customer loyalty!
Yeah, but he drinks out of it, he might leave some floaters, or he might have cooties, can't be too careful.
NyghtsSecond
Mon Apr 04, 2005 9:55 am
#11
Very well written. Thanks very much. You have me laughin in otherwise dark times.
And good reason for : <no title> <roleplayer>
Mentski
Mon Apr 04, 2005 7:00 pm
#12
I haven't had much trouble on Chimaera, apart from a fewpeople telling me to "speak english" and trying to teach me basic. I'm either really lucky, or a good judge of who to reply to on a first tell... In other words,noone I dont recognise the name of unless they spend the time to say a little more than just "hi" or "slice my weapon plz", oh, and NEVER EVER replying in coronet
It's a shame really, because I've always wanted to be in at least one "Chuckle for the Smuggler" style situation.
Message Edited by Mentski on 04-05-2005 03:01 AM
rixo1
Mon Apr 04, 2005 7:38 pm
#13
lets just say since i hit slicer 4 i have acumulated alot of non paying player weps couple nice ones 2
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