Jedi Archive
Thread: You might be a redneck Jedi if...
1) You think sleeping with your cousin was the last step after mastering a profession that opened your FSCS
2) Your idea of 'force sensitive' is when you get bitch-slapped trying to pickup a Twi-lek at the local cantina
3) You never graduated past the 3rd grade, and don't see what all the /findmytrainer nonsense is all about
4) You crafted your lightsaber from scrap parts at the local speeder junkyard
5) You think Darth's voice-box could use a rebuild using some old AT-ST parts
6) You hock your Holocron to the Junk Dealer to pay your rent on that Small Naboo House
7) You give up trying to figure out how to use the Holocron cause it reminds you of a rubik's cube
8) You complain to the DEVs that there is no 'bathtub' in your house to store extra speeder parts in
9) You thinkyour 'dark side' is those feelings you get whenever your cousin is around
10) You hang out with Jawa junk-hoarders cause they're the only ones who 'get you'.
Feel free to add your own.... ![]()
You make out with your sister on some friged ice planet.
/bash head on keyboard for even attempting to feed into this thread.
You have to smack your lightsaber on a hard suface to get it to work.
ImmortalOne666 wrote:Your Jedi robe is a Camouflage color. You have ever used your Light Saber to open a bottle of Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill You think the best use of your light saber is picking your teeth. At least one wing of your X-Wing is primer colored There is a blaster rack in the back of your landspeeder You have bantha horns on the front of your landspeeder You can find no grammatical errors in the way Yoda talks You think that Stormtroopers are just KKK members with really good sheets You have ever had an X-wing up on blocks in your yard. The worst part of spending time on Dagoba is the dadgum skeeters. Wookies are offended by your B.O. You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial. Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over t' the dark side... it'll be a hoot." You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the bar-b-q grill to light..
BEST POST EVER!
ImmortalOne666 wrote:
You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.
I was hoping though there would be something about kissing your own sister.
You can't describe the taste of an Ewok without using the word chicken.
You can levitate yourself using a force from within, but not THE force.
You lost a hand during a lightsaber fight because you stopped to spit.
The moonshine still you built on Endor is hidden so well even the Ewoks can't find it.