Jedi Archive
Thread: Regarding the CU...ow...it hurts...on so many levels
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Quiet420
Tue Apr 26, 2005 1:08 am
#1
this was originally posted on 12-02-03....eerie
Soccermom
SWG Petty Officer
Posts: 156
Registered: 08-25-2003
SWG Petty Officer
Posts: 156
Registered: 08-25-2003
Viewed 1613 times
I am a creature handler, and we all need a laugh. This might get locked, but consider it my Christmas gift to the game until then.
‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house
Just one creature was stirring, and clicking the mouse.
The stimpacks were hung from the backpacks with care,
Almost to master! Just need one more square!
Just one creature was stirring, and clicking the mouse.
The stimpacks were hung from the backpacks with care,
Almost to master! Just need one more square!
The grinders kept grinding, ignoring their beds,
While visions of holocrons danced in their heads.
And Mamma in her fleshwrap and I in my composite
Had just settled down after a quick terminal deposit.
While visions of holocrons danced in their heads.
And Mamma in her fleshwrap and I in my composite
Had just settled down after a quick terminal deposit.
When up on the message boards came such a chatter
I flew to the site to see what was the matter.
Away into Windows I stole with a flash,
To read the new nerf, cost of 15 bucks cash.
I flew to the site to see what was the matter.
Away into Windows I stole with a flash,
To read the new nerf, cost of 15 bucks cash.
The whiners already had cursed their new gun,
‘It’s nerfed beyond reason! This game is no fun!’
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But old Saint Q3PO full of nerf cheer.
‘It’s nerfed beyond reason! This game is no fun!’
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But old Saint Q3PO full of nerf cheer.
The SOE staff had their nerf bats at ready,
But the servers as always were not quite so steady.
More rapid than eagles the nerf lists they came,
And there was the update, and each nerf by name.
But the servers as always were not quite so steady.
More rapid than eagles the nerf lists they came,
And there was the update, and each nerf by name.
No med droids! No dancers! No Bounties or Armors!
No clothing! No pets and no lewt for lewt farmers!
By the end of the list, by the end of the post,
It was hard to tell who had been nerfed quite the most.
No clothing! No pets and no lewt for lewt farmers!
By the end of the list, by the end of the post,
It was hard to tell who had been nerfed quite the most.
I quickly logged on and loaded my ranger,
But his items were gone and his stats were in danger.
My backpack was empty, my hides were gone too,
Everything had been nerfed from my helm to my shoe!
But his items were gone and his stats were in danger.
My backpack was empty, my hides were gone too,
Everything had been nerfed from my helm to my shoe!
I clicked on a link and I wrote out a ticket,
In seconds the staff made it clear I could stick it.
I reported a bug: “This nerf must be a goof”
And suddenly 3PO popped in with a POOF!
In seconds the staff made it clear I could stick it.
I reported a bug: “This nerf must be a goof”
And suddenly 3PO popped in with a POOF!
“We’ve nerfed the whole game to eliminate cheaters,
(Then he paused and ran back when he warped 50 meters)
We nerfed every Twi’lek and Mon Calamari,
We nerfed every stat and made customers sorry.”
(Then he paused and ran back when he warped 50 meters)
We nerfed every Twi’lek and Mon Calamari,
We nerfed every stat and made customers sorry.”
“We made the Krayt Dragons less harmful than smurfs
and then we took care to nerf previous nerfs!
We nerfed Imps out on Bestine and Rebs out on Lok,
We nerfed all the flame guns and now they just smoke.”
and then we took care to nerf previous nerfs!
We nerfed Imps out on Bestine and Rebs out on Lok,
We nerfed all the flame guns and now they just smoke.”
Your once mighty carbines? Now barely can sting.
We nerfed every item! We nerfed everything!”
And as that old dev disappeared out of sight
He cried “15 bucks from all, and to all a nerf night!”
We nerfed every item! We nerfed everything!”
And as that old dev disappeared out of sight
He cried “15 bucks from all, and to all a nerf night!”
merry nerfmas one and all
AidanM
Tue Apr 26, 2005 1:23 am
#4
Quiet420 wrote:
this was originally posted on 12-02-03....eerie
Soccermom
SWG Petty Officer
Posts: 156
Registered: 08-25-2003
Viewed 1613 times
I am a creature handler, and we all need a laugh. This might get locked, but consider it my Christmas gift to the game until then.
‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house
Just one creature was stirring, and clicking the mouse.
The stimpacks were hung from the backpacks with care,
Almost to master! Just need one more square!
The grinders kept grinding, ignoring their beds,
While visions of holocrons danced in their heads.
And Mamma in her fleshwrap and I in my composite
Had just settled down after a quick terminal deposit.
When up on the message boards came such a chatter
I flew to the site to see what was the matter.
Away into Windows I stole with a flash,
To read the new nerf, cost of 15 bucks cash.
The whiners already had cursed their new gun,
‘It’s nerfed beyond reason! This game is no fun!’
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But old Saint Q3PO full of nerf cheer.
The SOE staff had their nerf bats at ready,
But the servers as always were not quite so steady.
More rapid than eagles the nerf lists they came,
And there was the update, and each nerf by name.
No med droids! No dancers! No Bounties or Armors!
No clothing! No pets and no lewt for lewt farmers!
By the end of the list, by the end of the post,
It was hard to tell who had been nerfed quite the most.
I quickly logged on and loaded my ranger,
But his items were gone and his stats were in danger.
My backpack was empty, my hides were gone too,
Everything had been nerfed from my helm to my shoe!
I clicked on a link and I wrote out a ticket,
In seconds the staff made it clear I could stick it.
I reported a bug: “This nerf must be a goof”
And suddenly 3PO popped in with a POOF!
“We’ve nerfed the whole game to eliminate cheaters,
(Then he paused and ran back when he warped 50 meters)
We nerfed every Twi’lek and Mon Calamari,
We nerfed every stat and made customers sorry.”
“We made the Krayt Dragons less harmful than smurfs
and then we took care to nerf previous nerfs!
We nerfed Imps out on Bestine and Rebs out on Lok,
We nerfed all the flame guns and now they just smoke.”
Your once mighty carbines? Now barely can sting.
We nerfed every item! We nerfed everything!”
And as that old dev disappeared out of sight
He cried “15 bucks from all, and to all a nerf night!”
merry nerfmas one and all
ubidoubi 
PupFitch
Tue Apr 26, 2005 2:09 am
#8
Oh, man... That was so ironic and awesome. I just called up my bro and had to "sing" this lil ditty to him.
haha!
haha!
Grienthumb
Tue Apr 26, 2005 3:28 am
#9
Great laugh and well done.
Message Edited by Grienthumb on 04-26-2005 03:28 AM
Andurilh
Wed Aug 31, 2005 6:36 pm
#11
Ever so funny and still, a year and a half later, ever so true.
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