Bio Engineer Archive
Thread: yeah, well....it could happen to you
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wet_wookie_farts
Wed Feb 18, 2004 12:51 pm
#1
alright...heh.
I was just pretending I was another crafting profession, lets say weaponsmith for the sake of arguement, going through what we have to put up with. I'm not saying that other crafters don't get their own share of this kind of stuff, seems to be the rule in this game...but i dunno, our situation seems a little unique, so i thought i'd present it in terms others could understand. of course, the following situation is 100% fantasy and purely for humorous/instructional purpouses.
I was just pretending I was another crafting profession, lets say weaponsmith for the sake of arguement, going through what we have to put up with. I'm not saying that other crafters don't get their own share of this kind of stuff, seems to be the rule in this game...but i dunno, our situation seems a little unique, so i thought i'd present it in terms others could understand. of course, the following situation is 100% fantasy and purely for humorous/instructional purpouses.
ok, devs just revamped my profession, i can make all kinds of neat-o new stuff.
all i have to do is create a generic weapon manifold to start with, then take your manifold add a few other resources and you're done, you can make anything you want.
wow...that sounds ridiculously easy...I can even make lightsabers! man everyone's gonna want one of them, I'm gonna be rich! (hey, its my fantasy, i can embelish slightly)
ok, cool, where do i start...says i need five mineral elements to make the generic thingie....just five "minerals" nothing specific and only one unit a piece, oh man this is a sweet deal. i'll just pop out of my house, sample some resources come back in and make a killer weapon, oh man, Goldmine!
10 minutes later...
cool, generic manifold done...now what else do i need...hmm, more sampling...but i can't sample the same piece of ground for different kinds of minerals once i've left it, something about "you do not have permission" or some such...and these minerals seem to take up one inventory space for each individual unit, what's the deal with that? and how can i sample iron from the same spot in the ground and get ore with different stats every time i sample until i stand up? oh well, no time to worry about that now.
another 10 minutes
alright! got my first "M-16-Squared pulse rifle" made! what's this? hmm, seems by just walking outside my door to sample the first piece of ground i walked across only yielded me a gun with a max damage of 30 and 467 overall condition....no one's going to buy this piece of garbage! let me take a look at the forums and see what i can find...
2 weeks later....
*sigh* ok...i'm just out of range of a static spawn of Randy Ancient Gnarled Rancors with Elephantitus and A Special Kind of Fondness For Whatever Species My Character Happens To Be....man i'll tell you, the devs have got some kind of imagination when it comes to naming these things...anyway...i was told that this 100m square patch of land on the planet of GoshForsakenHeckPit has some of the best minerals for making those uber lightsabers that you don't have to be a jedi to use. now if i make a few of them, break them down and reassemble the best parts from each, and do that about 5 or 6 times, i'll have a really great lightsaber that may or may not be usable by anyone in the galaxy.
the guy who ordered the batch i'm working on now wants ten Lightsabers for his guild in the next three days max and he's offering me 5K per. shame i can make more then one at a time. only reason i took the job at all is because it was the most reasonable offer and he was generous enough to wait for more then 10 minutes. been sitting in this spot for the past ten hours in nothing but the undies i was spawned in, only way i can hold enough samples to craft the first two or three sabers for that order...must have dozed off for a second there...man...this is boring...wait...what's that breathing on my neck?
Voice of Randy Ancient Gnarled Rancors with Elephantitus and A Special Kind of Fondness For Whatever Species My Character Happens To Be whispering in my ear: "Why hello there...do you come here often?"
darn...this is the third time today....oh well, just have to think happy thoughts.
darn...this is the third time today....oh well, just have to think happy thoughts.
10 minutes you don't want to know about later....
ah back in the clone center, just need to pick up some ointment and i'll be on my way. gotta think about the 50k...wait, what's this? aw jeez...that can't be right! No fair! Some guy in the med center just told me the devs are inventing a new profession that can make and use star destroyers and deathstars! i'm out of business! i'm ruined! woe is me!
oh well, my experience wasn't a total wash...met a few nice rancors...though they can be a little rough sometimes. something about the way they took advantage of me makes me think they're really the dev's player characters but the world may never know. oh well, guess i'll hand in another 15 bucks for next month....i mean, yeah i wasted my time, but its star wars man
Aneilym
Wed Feb 18, 2004 5:24 pm
#2
ROFLMAO! Man you are the one that stole my mission logs from my house! Thank god you changed the name so no one will know it was me! LOL
Dapadast
Wed Feb 18, 2004 5:37 pm
#3
Hahahaha, my my my ...... do we all sample the same spot? ![]()
please make more.
Wookiee_Cookie
Thu Feb 19, 2004 9:23 am
#4
Hahahahaha...
You have captured the essence of the BE, that's funny stuff.
You have captured the essence of the BE, that's funny stuff.
Wookiee_Cookie
Thu Feb 19, 2004 9:56 am
#5
You forgot to mention that after creating the lightsaber you must hand it to a technition so that he can enable it to be turned on and then you have to wait about a week for it to "fully charge".
Akelan
Thu Feb 19, 2004 10:49 am
#6
You got the gist of it, but missed out on the fact that every other lightsaber explodes in your face when assembled, and half of the rest are not really lightsabers, but pop out a little flag that says vrrrrooooommm-swoosh!
then there are the ones that come out with great speed and damage -- it's a shame the beam is only available in puce, khaki and avocado....
LLan
then there are the ones that come out with great speed and damage -- it's a shame the beam is only available in puce, khaki and avocado....
LLan
wet_wookie_farts
Thu Feb 19, 2004 1:31 pm
#7
yeah..i just woke up when i wrote that....was a late night of samplin fun, boy howdy. had some wierd dreams
Spazzers
Fri Feb 20, 2004 1:17 am
#9
LOL!! ![]()
You also forgot to mention that every other crafter in your galaxy is on that exact same spot sampling resources because its the only place to get it.
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